My parents again stressed me today. Again the same way, my dad not even knowing he is doing it and my mom doing it on purpose. It is not to the point it was last year when I thought I was going to completely lose my mind but it is getting there slowly.

I think the reason my mom is doing it on purpose is to show me that she won again (not going on the vacation that i would of paid for), if I am right she will get a big surprise soon. It's her attitude that has changed, the way she does it too has changed. It is more cruel, the face she has when she keeps on pushing too has cruelty and something else behind.

My dad still has the I don't care attitude he has always had and the thinking that he will always have a slave in the palm of his hand but he looks to be going deeper into madness.

This Winter I thought I was going to become like that or become crazy. The ultimatum idea has opened a little bit the door that seemed closed.

I am still working on getting some energy back, it is coming back slowly but surely. At least I feel less down than I was feeling not too long ago when I was feeling my sould dying.