Lisa LowCarb BellaOnline Editor
Highest Posting Power Known to Humanity
Joined: Jan 2004
It is wonderful that you are building up knowledge about your stress levels and how they impact you. You're doing a great job with better sleep, all due to your efforts with your stress levels. It's wonderful that you're building a resistance to the negativity!
I have a suggestion. So much of how we feel is caused by our own perceptions of the world. I.e. two people can be in the exact same room, seeing the exact same things, and one can be happy while the other is sad. It's all about how we allow ourselves to perceive what we see and hear. And we absolutely can change how we react. Brains are not fixed. Research proves this over and over again.
How we phrase things, with words, can have a strong impact on how we perceive things. Words impart meaning.
So, with that being said, I'd like to suggest an experiment. Instead of thinking of your parents having a cosmic "power" to force you to have stress, which they don't, think of them as being self-centered. What they are doing, they're doing for their own internal reasons. They are like mindless robots on a track. Even though it might seem that they are doing something for a reason involving you, really it's all about them. They want to feel better. For whatever twisted programming reason, doing something that interacts with you makes them feel better.
So, to simplify it, for this experiment, avoid saying they "are causing you stress" or "they are driving you crazy". Those all imply that they are forcing you to do things. They can't! They are completely outside your body. Only you are inside your own head.
Instead, phrase it from YOUR point of view. "I got stressed when my Mom did X." Or "I got upset when my Dad did Y." That's the first step! Phrase it that you had a reaction to something. Focus on your reactions.