I am fed up with my life too Anna. On November 11 I will be 37-years-old and September 9 2013 is the day I finally decided to not let my parents get to me anymore. I am still living with them but I do not let them manipulate and hurt me anymore and I am working on getting out. When I will get out it will be forever.

Did you have any troubles before meeting him? If not then tell yourself how happy you were before meeting him and without him you will be back to that time. If you were not then tell yourself that someone who do not trust you cannot help you, he can only drag you more down than you are.

I wish I could help you more. Until I got a computer with an internet connection I never had anyone help me and show me love. I am also in a very dark place but thankfully I had my awakening, hopefully you have yours too.