Yea, one day is better than the other. But if there is a time machine, even someone tells me it might cost my life, I will definitely jump in and go back in time to 3 years ago.

I am even thinking starting a pre-natal counseling program to help people to understand what changes might bring to their lives after having a kid. It is a huge change, but the society seems to promote the idea that it is only good changes. For most people, yes, and good for them. But for some, making a more informative decision may change their mind.

Here is my own prescription for myself:

1. Try to make more friends with happy moms, so hopefully I can feel I am one of them.

2. Find nanny or baby sitter when I feel like it, so I can spend time with my hubby. and I won't resent my child as much.

3. Do my best but knowing I can't be the perfect mom, my child has her own fate.

4. I am doing this for God, like a charity thing, so I'm doing him a favor by raising his child! LOL.