You are very correct Pam, it is funny and "scary" to say I have changed. The love has grown, to be honest, I am not pretending now, I DO enjoy her most of the time.
I think it is really important that mother and daughter needs to be "compatible" in order for the mother to enjoy this process. I truly feel I am lucky that my daughter has grown to be such a fun little girl, who I can already tell she has the personality of understanding, loving and not being stuborn. All of these are the traits that I appreciate and pray for. and She has it all. So I can't help to love her more and more everyday. She is part of my life now, although sometimes I do want to be with my hubby for a while just to be "me".
About lost identity, I do not see that as a big issue in my social life. I do not talk about baby all the time. I talked about traveling, food, investment, everything I am interested in.
Before, when I heard a couple does not have kids, I envy. But now, I thought to myself, I am lucky to have a girl, and I smile when I have this thought.
I understand for those who are child free and saw my post and got scared. To be honest with you, if this post push you to be child free, that's just fate. that means, you are not meant to have kids in your life by destiny. But I have a little girl now, and that is my fate as well, it is hard work, but I feel the joy and love which is also very rewarding. So enjoy your life, child free, or mothers! That is the point of my post, just voice our feeling, and respect each other, and just enjoy life.
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