Mazurka, that was a fantastic description of motherhood!

All of us go through that. The connection you are trying to create, the understanding, and information, you are trying to impart, is better for your health and energy, if you wait till they are older. You need to step back and not take their squabbling and energy as defiance. Observe them as giggling girls in a field of daisies. You need to keep them safe, you need to direct them to the bath to brush their teeth. You need to not allow them to demand their own way, and follow simple rules, when they can. Otherwise, let them be care free. Take your one to one bonding in the middle of chasos. Teaching one while the other is in proximity, allows the other to learn (sometimes) by osmosious. If your books have gotton stale, go to the library. And don't, I repeat don't take things so seriously, or personalize their personalities. Your kids are their own persons. I could read my child stories in the car (while driving) cause I knew the book by heart.

Moms of young kids, tend to drag along looking for a personal time out. The energy level of young children, can suck the life out of you. Allow their high energy to bang off of each other and the great outdoors, while you think, read, or workout, in their presence. People make the mistake of thinking kids can respond as an adult, when required. But, the reality is that when you try to make kids act this way, you are more apt to look/feel immature or childish. I ran laps around the yard while my boys played together. I got in shape, stayed warm, stayed interested, became mentally resilient. They had fun being what ever it was they wanted to be. I used their "foolish" time before bed, to straighten the bedroom and get organized. Climb into bed and call, 'storytime.' If they 'cut up' too much no story. They learn fast.

My first child would ignore my plea's to conform. One day a friend distracted him, this stopped the improper behavior, by a swipe of her hand, and no break in our conversation. A huge lightbulb moment for silly me.

I found managing two children, OK. The third kid was the one that broke the 'time camels' back. I was having a serious conversation, dealing with a crying spell, plus some other emergency, while cooking dinner. I discovered that the unfinished conversations, or lack of compassion, that I felt a failure for, didn't affect our family, my kids ability to grow into compassionate young men, one bit. When things get crazy, join it! Lighten up, chuck routine, and always keep your secret weapon handy; a warm hug.

PS. bath the kids together. I had three in the tub for years. Everyone crawl into one bed and read stories, together. Streamline duties, make your life more fun for you. You are allowed fun, too. We can't "control" our kids, we can only control the atmosphere.

Last edited by MomsPaula; 09/10/07 10:02 AM.