I wish I had an answer for you. It does sound as if your baby would not have had a very good father, though. <img src="/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />
Maybe instead of focusing on what the baby would have looked like in a bad way, you can try to imagine this in a positive light. I'm not a counselor or anything; but instead of trying to picture your baby's face as something you have lost, focus on your baby's face with a different thought in your head.
Try to imagine your baby's face, think of the different combinations of your eyes with his hair, etc.; but instead of focusing on the loss, focus on the details and the love. Make it positive. If you are into art at all, possibly you could try to draw or paint this little person and that would give you someone to look at, something like a photo. But you need to focus on the love rather than the loss.
Maybe this will help with the healing some.
