Skinny cow - my feeling is this. (and please don't get upset) - the phone call - do you think he's having an affair? If you have to ask that question - then its probably true. Having someone in your life shout at you - your kids - push your self esteem so far down you can't see tomorrow? You didn't mention the ages of your children - but i can tell you - my kids heard the arguing - knew their father had an affair - heard me crying etc. Even if you THINK you're hiding the tension - it's there. It can't be good for you - as i am coming from the "I LOVE FOOD" era - and whenever i was feeling down i would eat - usually chocolate! BUT - to have someone who is SUPPOSED to love and support you make you feel like this - i am sorry - but you deserve better! Come on - really - take a look in the mirror - size 18 or size 8 - who really cares? Are you the same person he married? Is he? To judge someone because of their weight or blame them because of certain issues - is a cop out! It sounds like he's not happy - and is doing everything in his power to make you feel unhappy too.....
We are here for you skinnycow - but i beg you - please - NOTHING is worth being in a relationship with someone that CLEARLY doesn't appreciate you - AT ALL! This really pushes my buttons and i'm sorry that i'm getting angry - but NO ONE should be able to do this to you - NO ONE!
Please don't 'wait' - the waiting is over. You have decisions to make - for your children - and for you. From experience - the 'waiting' game only makes things worse - and takes longer to get through - and there is more of an opportunity to make you feel worse! I don't think he's changed - i think he knows he can do this to you - and he's doing it. Unless and until you lay ground rules - he will continue. So PLEASE - for me - look in the mirror today and say this : I am worthy to be loved - i am worthy to cared about - i love me. It sounds corny - but it works.....your children will come out of this with higher self-esteem -and more respect for their mother....so please.....no more waiting!
