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My stress levels were low today. I worked on publicizing the upcoming Mused deadline, which is on May 8th. I love Mused, it helps promote new photographers, poets, and writers. It makes me so happy to work on it. So my stress levels were fairly serene.

Except the ants in the kitchen, we have a minor infestation. I've done all my part of cleaning, but Bob has dirty pots out that he hasn't cleaned. So that does give me a little stress. Hopefully he will clean them tonight.


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Lower stress today, since I am still sick and on a mental time-out.

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Through the roof :-(


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It has been a rollercoaster these past few days. I am trying to put into paper my thoughts and ideas of the past months and I am also planning some things which involve some change. I did made some changes at the end of last month, they were small but still changes.

My mom did not speak to me for a few days because I dared told her the truth and my opinion and it was done in front of someone else. The day of my small changes she was still acting like that. She now has stopped but she can see that I am not totally the same and since she is not stupid she knows it's her fault, she will never apologize though.

My dad was calm for a few days but today he is driving me crazy. He has started whistling and singing like a psychopath.

I did see a cute puppy in a parking lot today and he/she came up to me, that calmed me down greatly.

My throat stress issues (thinking im chocking) are not gone yet, they were close to gone but it has come back since my stress has been up and down. I still have half of one of my mom's ativan (in 1..i have been prescribed 10 in 0.5...took the first half the day i went to the hospital to get some tests done after taking antibiotics for nothing for a badly and not needed filling) and I think I will take it before going to bed soon if this does not stop. I won't take it tonight since I have to get up at 6:00 tomorrow to help a neighbor (shes the only sane person here + she has a Golden Retriever and i may go walk with him) and besides I only want to take it if I see a panic attack coming or something like that.

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Hi everyone. This has been the most meaningful mental health forum on Bella Online for me. People talk about real issues they are having, and getting advice from a collective of others with mental health issues. Life is not just happy and sunny little thoughts. People in the trenches need a place where they can say what is bothering them. It helps to share what we are really going through. I just got back from a family reunion of over 100 people. Talk about stress! Yikes. There was a lot of fun things that happen and it was nice to visit with the cousins I played with in childhood and how they grew up. There was a lot of mother-daughter issues between lots of mothers and daughters. I couldn't really couldn't deal with a lot of the logistics and drama that the week was infused with and was very glad for my Xanax. I didn't go into the fetal position once! Which is a great accomplishment for me and my psychiatrist. It means we are succeeding in accepting what is and letting go of what we don't need. Hooray! Thanks for listening.

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Thankfully my mom did not tell my nice neigbor that I would too go help this morning (my dad and an uncle cut a tree of hers...my mom helped her with a rose bush..i would of walked with Toby [the Golden Retriever] since hes afraid of big noises...turns out he did not mind this morning) because I went to bed after midnight and got up about twelve hours later! I was in bed for a little more than seven hours the night before and slept for less than one hour so I was tired.

My stress today is less severe. My energy is even up a little. My luck has not turned though (its been that way since moving here november 9 of 2009), I sincerely and without lying can say that I have had no normal day since being in that house. I was always sad and lonely but at least I had normal days! From the little things to the big things and everything in between nothing works. I'm lucky that Michael Schumacher came back for three years because without him driving in Formula One I would be way worst than I am now.

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Ruby Jane, I commend you for that fantastic accomplishment! smile

Nancy, I hope you can move out soon to lessen your stress!


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Thank you Lori! I hope so too! My parents today have made my stress go higher. My dad is killing my mom she accepts it, he wait until she serves him she does, it's a never ending cycle. Plus my dad who whistle and sing like a deranged psychopath and my mom does it too. I'm living in an asylum.

My mom is dying from who know what (i made a post in the stomach section) and she apparently have no problem with that and during that time my dad does not care at all, he goes around like she will live until he does so he can have his slave forever. I don't know if the plan is that I will become my dad's slave when my mom will be gone, if that's it then they're in for a big surprise!

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Nancy -

I'm so sorry to hear about the medical issues in the house.

A lot of how we perceive the world is based on our expectations of it. That is, very few things are inherently "good" or "bad" or "annoying" - it's all how we view them.

So for example you currently view the singing and whistling as a bad thing. So it annoys you. However, lots of people would be thrilled to have people who sang and whistled, rather than sulked in silence. So see if you can reframe how you view it. Their singing and whistling is nice. It's their way of adding music to the world, like a bird singing its song. It's part of their song. It's a good thing that they sing and whistle. I love it when Bob walks around the house singing, it's a sign that he has positive energy within him.

It might take a little time, but it sounds like it's worth it, if it's part of your environment!

And consider, too, that they're both under stress with what is going on and maybe that is part of their stress coping mechanism. So when you hear it, think that they might be handling their own stress that way, and it's better to do that than to bottle it up.


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It is the way they do it that is driving me insane. My dad either does it when he is happy after hurting my mom or after making trouble or he does it sounding like a maniac. When my mom does it she is copying him, she too was annoyed by him doing it at first but now she does it too and sometimes she does it so much that she is more annoying than he is on that day. If they would do that normally I would not mind most of the times (i admit that it would get me annoyed sometimes of course but not all the time and not to the point of about to blow up from the stress). It is so much that when I hear someone do that I want to hit that person (i of course dont do anything verbally and physically) and even some noises makes me think of that.

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