BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids "I couldn't imagine life without them"...

It is often religious people who use their natural/unnatural lists. It is unnatural to be homosexual (although there are homosexual behaviors in the animal kingdom). It is unnatural to be a vegetarian, because other animals eat animals too, and God made them actually for us to use them (I am a vegetarian and I had to hear that). It is unnatural to have sex with no intention to have children.
But comparisons to animals are only good if they work their way. We don't usually have sex on a whim every time we feel like it with perfect strangers, like lots of animals do. No, we are not animals, religious people would say. But then, than would be a lot more natural than never ever having sex, something no other living creature would do.
Not that long ago, the father of a young woman in Italy was called the most horrible things by the Catholic Church there because she wanted her daughter to stop being artificially nourished/fed (sorry, English is not my first language). She had been over unconscious over 15 years and she had no chance to improve, but these Nature advocates considered that the most natural thing to do is have someone tubed in for life. That doesn't exist in nature either.

Sorry I rant, but I hate those anti-natural comments. Nature is so rich and varied, you can always take what suits you best.

So true Solalux, I like bread too, couldn't imagine life without it but I don't want to make my own! I know it's a serious subject, it just popped into my head. J

[quote=Cassie67]The term "unnatural" in regards to women not wanting to have children really irks me. Why is it that because we are biologically designed to bear children that we are expected to just do it........to follow the lifestyle that "everyone else" does? People need to start minding their own business and keep their comments to themselves. Ok....done ranting now.... [/quote] If we look at the natural and unnatural, its all right that a women without children is incomplete. If its natural to live without having children then how we come to this world and how this system will run. Babies are a blessing and a living gift for us. Without babies we are incomplete and nothing could replace the babies.

[quote=DataBit]If we look at the natural and unnatural, its all right that a women without children is incomplete. If its natural to live without having children then how we come to this world and how this system will run. Babies are a blessing and a living gift for us. Without babies we are incomplete and nothing could replace the babies.[/quote] In modern society, the only thing that is "natural" is to have freedom of choice. Anything else is barbaric.

Women who do not want children at all can maybe just laugh at your post.

Personally, I was silly enough to be bothered by such comments, they used to hurt me immensely, but I guess that was my fault alone, for caring about other people's opinions.

But those who cannot naturally have them... well I guess you just sentenced them to a meaningless unfulfilled existence too.

PS: Saying that babies are a blessing is such a clich�!... not to mention a very risky generalization.

[quote=Solalux] Personally, I was silly enough to be bothered by such comments, they used to hurt me immensely, but I guess that was my fault alone, for caring about other people's opinions. [/quote] Glad I wasn't the only one that was slightly offended, but, I'm still at the early stage that Solalux mentioned where comments about me being a sad,unfulfilled person for not reproducing still hurts me. I could say that those with "blessings" live unfulfilled lives because they don't get the freedom I do to travel/eat out/etc. but, I respect each person's decision because it is the right one for them.

Solalux,
Thank you for speaking out. I am one of the ones who desperately wanted a child, tried for nearly a decade to conceive, ended up divorced and childless (now childfree though). At this point in my life, words no longer hurt. But during the nearly 10 years of trying and the year or so after giving up, words cut me to the core. I know I would have been blessed, but that isn't the only blessing. Even without a child, I'm learning to feel complete. It takes a very long time though to start to forget the sadness and pain of the journey.

I do feel good that I was able to read the words and not have a hot flash, get all teary-eyed, feel like I'd been socked in the gut, and break out into shakes. That is progress.

Life offers us all so much more.

Highly offended databit, such generalisations are so.....urgh. In fact why waste my energy on such an ignorant comment. Childfree and complete! J

DataBit: Evidently you have not read the many threads posted here where many of us women are happy and feel complete without bearing children. That is our choice in a civilized world. We no longer have to feel pressured by society to follow a certain script when living our lives. We are caring, loving, hard working people like everyone else.

There will never be a shortage of babies in this world, so no worries there. Babies certainly are a blessing to couples that desire having a family. Babies are innocent, and I don't think any one of us here would think that there is a replacement for a human life.

We choose a different lifestyle that should be respected like everyone else's, and our peaceful existence feels very natural to us. Not everyone is cut out to be parents, and to those that are, God bless them!

hi Cassie67 Too right, I couldn't have put it better myself, I thought I had stumbled into a different forum when I read Databits comments, each to their own but this forum is where you can get away from other peoples narrowmindedness!