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If you want to forget all your other troubles, wear too tight shoes.

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The trouble with born-again Christians is that they are an even bigger pain in the butt the second time around.

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My mother's menu consisted of two choices: Take it or leave it!

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If you think nobody cares whether you're alive or dead, try missing a couple of car payments.

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My ultimate vocation in life is to be an irritant. How am I doing?

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I wished the buck stopped here 'cause I could use a few right now.

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When the rapture comes, can I have your car?


Vance Rowe
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Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

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Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

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Why is it call "after dark" when it really is "after light"?

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