BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Where Do You Go On Bella Besides Our Room?

We are so fortunate on BellaOnline to have so many resources to so many different walks of life. Sometimes I go all over the place in different forums and threads that have nothing to do with me just to catch a glimpse at other lifestyles. I mean, I've been in the Gay/Lesbian room, the Large 'n' Lovely room, the Cheating room, the Flowers room, the Dialysis thread, you name it. We really are fortunate.

Of course, sometimes I lurk a mommy room. Nothing wrong with that...they drive by MNK, too. I just passed through a room tonight with women (bless their hearts, really) who have miscarried. I must say that while my heart really goes out to them, especially as it would with a dear friend needing comfort and solice, I seriously have to dig into a heart of humanity far bigger than my own to even begin to understand their pain...and their desire. It's literally like a foreign language. Why I brought this in our room: it's like a comfort to me, feeling the way I do (very strange, out of place) reading about their longings to conceive. They say things like, "I'm so devastated, I had my 2nd miscarriage, a baby is the only thing in the world I want for me and my DH, etc..." but I swear all I see is "Wing chong fung huong roo aki too bing riko tung." Like...a language so foreign. When reading their posts, I know we're both women, the lady suffering and I, but I feel and know nothing of what she feels.

This Web site is truly informative, allowing for so many different souls to unload.

Where do you go in Bella? Where do you peek, and how do you feel when you go there? I will love to hear these responses.

Angela,

Like you, I go all over the place. When I first joined I headed straight here (I followed a link from the Purple Women Blog, to Kim's page, to here), but then I checked out the Pro-Choice Forum (I don't think I've posted in there), the weightloss forum (I've been dieting since July), the reading forum (Romance, sci fi, fantasy, etc.). I've also checked out the wine forum (I asked a red wine question--I don't drink red wine and was bringing a bottle to a relative's house), the dog forum, the Democrat Forum, and lately, the hair forum.

I really only visit other forums when I'm bored and I follow a topic link (right column of the page) that looks interesting.

This is really the only forum I post actively in, though I have posted a few times here and there. This is the most friendly board. Some of the other bords I've posted in, people kind of ignored me--though no one's been rude at all. I consider this board my Bella Home.

Hi - I actually never go anywhere else on Bella - I just hone right on in on Married No Kids. Usually when I get online I can't WAIT to get there.

Just occasionally in the early days I went on the mother forums just to read about their experiences, but now that's no longer of interest to me.

Hnestly there is so much substance and activity on this particular board, I don't need to go anywhere else on Bella, apart from Kim's actual MNK pages to read new articles.

This is the only board the I go on as well. I sometimes would post on Ivillage CFBC, but got so tired of the mommies on the board that I really don't go there anymore. I did however, go on a mommy board and lurked. There was a huge topic about a women who regretted having her child and was so miserable. She was getting therapy but she said it wasn't helping. I couldn't believe what I was reading. Most of the others were sympathic and told her about their depression and that it would get better but she hated being a mom and said she was just faking it so she wouldn't show other she hated it. I was tempted to post but didn't. I would never say anything rude or challenging like they do here but actually I don't even know what I would of said. While I was reading the post I acutally new I did not belong.

I will post on things that I think are interesting, though I don't go into the Mommy forums. Except for once about breastfeeding. Everyone was laying into Jennifer Lopez for choosing formula and saying it was best for her babies. They were upset that she was setting a precedent. I was like, "wouldn't it be nice if mothers could make their own choices and not be criticized for it by other mothers? And who is going to follow the mothering advice of a celebrity, anyway?"

But yes, I've posted on non-child-related issues on a few forums, like Hair and Gardening and Reading and stuff like that.

I am a regular on Low Carb and Yoga, and also post on Cleaning, Walking, Exercise, Sci-Fi, Prime Time TV and Small/Home Office. Among other interesting topics that pop up to the right on the Latest Messages chart.

I like to venture into different topics, i like playing the different games some are quite a challenge. i sorta stay away from topics i know nothing about. but in general its all good

I hop skip and jump all around ;0)

All over. In fact, what brought me here -- and it is fascinating hearing what y'all have to say -- was on the side seeing a topic (not knowing where it was taking me) of "Why do you want children?" And I'm passionately fond of being a mother, equally passionate that I don't want anyone who doesn't want a child to have one.

Other places: gifted education, homeschooling, school reform, writing for children, writing nonfiction, moms, midlife, alternative medicine, headaches, environment, atheist, philosophy, spirituality -- umm, might've left some out. I'm a dabbler, with varied interests and lots of curiousity. (Some might just say I'm "curious!")

I've been thinking about your post Angela. What you said about the infertility forum is so true!! If anyone I should fit in somewhere like that if I'm meant for motherhood (since we have fertility issues) but I can't relate to that at all. If I wanted to look for things to be depressed about, that would be one thing, but I'd rather look at the bright side. I get to live my life for me! What a terrible tragedy!! (not). I've had some major adversity in life, and infertility, while I realize it's very upsetting to people, does not exactly qualify as a tragedy for me. Maybe I'm in denial.

I tend to check out different forums at Bella, but nothing feels quite like MNK. I have tons of interests in common with some of the other forums (yoga, exercise, gardening, cooking, writing, relationships, etc.) but the other forums are so much quieter it's hard to get too interested. For awhile I was interested in the Moms forum, because of those honest posts about motherhood. But that forum just went completely dead after someone questioned one of the mothers about why she had a second child when she knew she hated motherhood after the first. That just shut the place down. Here I thought the conversation was getting interesting!

But with other forums at Bella, I get the sense that my reputation as a MNK rabble rouser follows me around, and most of the other regular posters at the other forums are mothers, so probably hate me. I guess it's like in real life where we can't really talk freely on this subject without everyone hating us. Since I am able to talk freely here, the people at the other forums probably think I'm a monster. That's the feeling I get at least.