BellaOnline Forums Beauty and Self Stress Management I think I'm depressed. What to do?

I�ve been feeling emotionally and physically exhausted�.I recently retired and can�t seem to get motivated about anything. On top of that I sense a certain dread when I approach my Saturday bill paying routine, unanticipated home-maintenance, and medical expenses. I�ve heard that new retirees get a little stir-crazy or anxious is this an adjustment phase?

You�re just stressing naturally since you don�t have a job to blame stress on anymore. It seems simple, but having a hobby you can really get into and spend time on can be helpful. As far as the bills are concerned, might be time to review your expenses. Do you eat out a lot? That�s an obvious fix. Do you rent movies at the local video store? Try a cheaper alternative like Netflix. Simple things, like do you leave all the lights on in the house? That adds up.(take a look atBellaOnline ALERT: Raw URLs are not allowed in these forums for security reasons. Please use UBB code. If you don't know how to do UBB code just post here for help - we will help out!

Gina, i'm sorry you're not feeling well lately.

There seem to be two types of retirees. Those who have interests they always wished to have more time for, and those who feel uprooted by retirement and who, in a way, are grieving a loss.

I think you need something new to do. Something perhaps that can give you some structure to your time and new people to meet. How about a 15 - 20 hour volunteer job, or taking a couple of classes at the community college to begin? If you are a senior, you can even take classes at a community college for free. Contact your nearest community college to find out more. You may be interested in knowing, some community colleges have a lot of seniors taking classes. At my local college, they particularly liked the phys ed classes (because it was like getting a gym membership but for a lot less!) and the arts and history classes. They also often have not for credit classes like genealogy, gardening, investment, languages, yoga, etc.

Having a volunteer job or classes will do several things for you. It will make you get up and get out of the house at a certain time, at least on some days. This alone is likely to give you a lot more energy. I don't know how it works, but, being self-employed, i know it does... because i run into the same challenge when i have no schedule to follow. Sometimes it's important just to get moving and get a change of scenery.

Also, you will be meeting new people and get introduced to new ideas if you start volunteering or return to school. If you don't feel like you have direction now, don't worry. Volunteering for the first organization that crosses your path and needs help, or taking classes, will give you new experiences, and those, in turn, will help you find your new direction.

Some places that so often need volunteers: schools and community groups often need tutors for children. You could help them with reading or math, and it is such a wonderful thing to help children!

Animal shelters also need a lot of help. I know the ones in my community never have enough people to walk dogs or feed the animals, and the animals need love, too.

Churches are another great source for volunteer work, and some churches run food kitchens or raise funds for emergency relief and so forth.

There are also community choirs and theatre groups and art centers you could join. Dust off some of your old dreams that have been set aside for a long while.

Don't worry about what the right fit is. Just start something and soon you will find direction again.

I hope you feel better soon.

Hello Gina,

Here's what you should do next...

I believe you have a computer and Internet connection since you are posting to this forum. Why not use whatever you have now to make yourself some money by doing Internet Business.

They are many resources you can learn right away by doing some keyword searches on Google. The best part is you don't need a lot of money to begin with. Do you know some only started with $10 and now have become a millionaire?

I wish you best in whatever step you're going to take next.

Izrul Fizal

Hello Gina,
in my personal case, visualisation has been the key factor.
These are not just words that we create, every day, every seconds, the world we (and we will) live in.
Your fears could belong to history if you consider you have all potentialities in your mind.
It's actually easier to see things in a different light than changing things.
And the magic in all that is that once you changed your point of view, you'll see things changing around.
For sure, in depression state, you don't feel like 'playing with your environment' and changing your state of mind.
But that's probably the faster and healthier way to recover.

Cheers
Laure

Hi Gina,

Not to worry -- this is a passing phase. Most mild depressions are as such, as I'm sure you know from past experience. It's okay that we sometimes slip into feeling less than exuberant; in fact, it's in climbing back out of such feelings that define us and make us stronger. Seems like you might just be going through a transition, as you've done before.

I really like all the suggestions posted, especially the plethora offered by hollyelise.

Volunteer work gets you "out of yourself" and puts your body, skills and mind to work for others. I've heard retirement can make one feel less purposeful; volunteer work puts purpose right back in your life on levels you may never have experienced. It's philanthropy by using one of the more valuable resources we as humans have -- you pay in this life with either time or money, and in giving your time, you're giving something just as good, if not better, than money.

I would also recommend journaling. Maybe get a blank-paged journal and title the first page, "My Journey in Retirement," or do the same in soft copy on your computer. It's incredibly therapeutic, and you'll see yourself progress in mental health and stability over time. Sometimes you'll journal good days, other times you'll journal the not-so-good ones, but the best thing about it is that it's all you without need for validation. It's pages and chapters in your life. For many people, this way of documenting their own lives lends way to improvement, as we all desire to see happy endings.

Good thing you noticed this in yourself; reaching out for advice is something many people don't do, but you did. You'll get ideas and you'll grow. Just in reaching out proves you're not content and wish to change...it's the "how" that you'll wrangle with for a little while. No biggie -- it's called "growth," and apparently you're not done yet. On a more spiritual note, maybe your purposes in this life aren't yet fulfilled...what happens next? *wink*

Best wishes to you, Gina.