BellaOnline Forums Education Gifted Education how old are your gifted kids?

I'm glad to see we have some parents here who have younger kids. I think the mix of ages makes things more interesting. Having talked to several families very recently who are happy with school accommodations, it strikes me that all the success stories are about BOYS! Isn't that odd?

What do you think? Are boys accelerated more readily than girls?

Lorel

i have a 5 yr old and a 1 1/2 yr old
both of mine are boys

i have a 5 yr old and a 1 1/2 yr old
both of mine are boys

oops! only needed one of those
they will NOT accelerate my son in our district, even though he is very socially adaptable and has test scores and recommendations from his preschool teachers to back up the request.

his potential teacher is an "early childhood developmental specialist" and does believe that to be in the interests of a child his age, stating that he needs the socialization factors learned in K and that he will not socially recover without this particular year of socialization. she did not ask me a single, probing question about any of his abilities.

if we can't get around her, we're homeschooling

Throughout most of human history, kids were educated singly or in multi-age groups. Institutional schooling that separates kids strictly by birth year is a modern concept and in my humble opinion, a faulty one. Kids need to learn socialization, but that doesn't mean that they need to be in a room of 25 kids exactly the same age. Social skills are important, I am certainly not denying that. My idea of socialization involves relating to individuals and not being part of a homogeneous herd.

Zandes, I wish you luck with your son. You might enjoy this article about the benefits of acceleration.

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Lorel: extremely interesting article

With one year of school under our belts, I've already seen some of the social issues that they mentioned for not accelerating a child and keeping them in a classroom with their chronological age-mates.

My son is starting to be ostracized by a group of children in his class. It's an interesting dynamic. He's interacting with them, and then they can't understand him. His words or ideas are too complex. Their first reaction is frustration and then anger. They leave and go to a group where they understand each other. Then, the group is angry with him as the first child to get upset "tells on him" with the other children. My son doesn't understand what "he did" to drive theother child away. He goes and apologizes. Then everyone is friends again.

At this age, this whole process only lasts about 15 minutes. However, it was an EXTREMELY frightening thing for me to see on my class observation days.

This happens at parks, playgrounds, etc. as well when we are with similar aged children. It will happen more than once in a typical hour unless my son tones himself down. He's discovered that coping by blending in works. He talks to children the same way they talk to him. He uses one child's lisp with him, another's accent with him, the same phrases, the same mispronounced letters - each only with the child who uses them. When we leave, he seems drained and angry. He's figuring out how to hide.

I don't want him to think that his gift is a flaw.
However, I almost feel like homeschooling him is hiding as well.
I'm at a loss. I just know that, somehow, things need to change. And, I'm losing hope that it can happen in our district's schools.

Lorel, I have two boys--both of whom are experiencing great success in the schools--so I can't agree that school-success stories only involve girls. Having said that, however, I will note an observation I made when attending the end-of-year awards ceremony at my oldest son's school a few weeks ago. A disproportionate number of the awards for Most Outstanding Student in specific subject areas were won by girls. An equally disproportionate number for Most Improved Student in specific areas were won by boys. Which would seem to indicate that the boys have more of a struggle, at least initially.

Re: acceleration for boys vs. girls--again, I have no first-hand experience with a girl. It has worked wonderfully for my son. However, there are few children who are accelerated in our school system (it happens, but not every year and not with great regularity) and all of the students who have been grade advanced and/or subject-matter accelerated in the past 5-7 years have been boys. Every single one of them. I really cannot even hazard a guess as to why that is.

Rats! I apologize to everyone. In my previous post, I intended to say that the kids I know who have successfully accelerated have almost all been BOYS. I think that gifted girls may often be overlooked.

Amy, it's interesting to hear about the stats for your school. All boys grade skipped, and mostly girls earning those outstanding awards... I'm not sure what to conclude. Maybe boys are less self conscious and don't try to blend in or hide as much, and girls are more eager to please?

Lorel: There's actually some validity to your statement. There's a social focus now on promoting educational success for boys. Why? Because women have gained a majority foothold in many of the educational stratas; and that's hard for a traditionally male-oriented society (I won't say domineated...) to deal with. There's a fear among social and educational researchers and policy-makes alike that boys will soon be left behind (like girls once were many years ago).

Thanks so much to all who responded. If you are reading this and you haven't yet answered, I encourage you to take a moment to post. You don't have to leave any identifying information, just tell me how old the gifted child/ren in your life might be!

Lorel