BellaOnline Forums Beauty and Self Stress Management My husband makes life full of stress

yeah i agree with you madampeachy

To me it sounds like you need some adult intereaction, maybe a pt job away from the baby and the absent husband. It's hard to be a stay at home mom, when you're alone ALL the time. He's stressed, but as many have said, it's for your future. He gives you assignments? Don't know what to make of that. Try something new, I'm sure there are other people in your community in your same situation feeling the same way you do; campus usually has resources that may benefit you.

Perhaps the question here is, "What do you need to do to improve the way your husband affects you?"

I understand what it's like to feel your husband creates a lot of stress in your life. In fact, I felt the same way until I realized that I am the one who is in control of how I let others affect me, including my husband.

I learned to put up boundaries and figure out what makes me happy so that I could offset the drama my guy added. Now, I am happy and not feeling that my happiness depends on my husband.

I wrote an article about this called, What if He Doesn't Change? . I hope it inspires you!

How about the stress your husband have? Oh no here I am being a traitor to my own gender again; I always forget that only women matter .

I find my husband to be a comfort.

As Tami pointed out, we are always wholly the ones responsible for the stress we experience. No external person can cause stress or make stress for us. It is all about how we choose to interpret and judge things. We have control over our way of perceiving our world.

Let's say my boyfriend comes home unhappy and turns on the TV full volume while I was working on a quiet project.

I can choose to be stressed and grumpy about this. I can choose to feel this is somehow a cruel personal assault on me and that I should therefore be stressed and upset a a result.

On the other hand, I can choose to realize he's had a rough day and is full of stress. His actions aren't about doing anything at all to me. He is trying to unwind himself and reduce his own stress. He probably doesn't even realize that I was liking the quiet.

If I take the healthier path and think about the issue from his point of view, I realize he is in a rough situation and needs some help. I can then help him relax. And then he's happier and I'm happier. And we're all happier, and our world is that much better.

The more we perceive others in our world as co-travelers on a common journey, the more our own stresses come into perspective and we're able to manage them without issue.