BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Talked to husband about CFil him

Same here - my husband is the fun uncle when we babysit. I do all the "sitting" and he just goes up to his office when he gets bored/annoyed/tired/etc.

Ingilbert, do you know what a friend of mine mentioned to her husband? She asked him when he might consider his sex change... he was astonished, and asked her what the heck she was talking about....

'Why? Would you not ever consider a sex change?' she asked.
'No, never! why would you say that?'
'..Sure you won't change your mind?'
No! I'd never do that! What's your point, what are you getting at - ?'
Well, I feel the same way about NEVER having kids. And I won't be changing my mind, ever! Just so's you are quite clear about that, ok?'
And off she went to make a cup of tea....

They still don't haver kids, he's accepted it, and they're still together.

Good luck.

....And don't forget to add...
"And THAT's how I've always seen MY life, ok?'

If you have a Big Brothers Big Sisters organization in your area, lngilbert, I would recommend that your husband apply to be a big brother. I work for BBBS and we match kids as young as six. It is a big responsibility to be a BB or BS and he will be expected to have outings on his own with the child. No one will be there to pick up the slack. It is a really great experience and opportunity to give to a child and makes a big difference for them. My husband is a BB and he loves it-though I think it has caused him to be even more positive he does not want his own kids.

I actually am involved with BBBS and I have a 10 year old Little. She is great, but it really makes me realize how much work kids are. It is kind of nice to be a positive influence on her, but I don't have to worry about all of the other stuff that goes along with having children.

This is off topic, but what do you guys DO with your Littles? We love to spend time with our nieces/nephews/neighbors but we seem to run out of ideas pretty quickly on what to do.

We take lots of walks, bike rides, movies, make your own ... pizza/sundae/soda (club soda & juice). I like to torture them by taking them out to nice restaurants and teaching them how to dine out I keep puzzle books around for them. They enjoy being helpful so I try to give them little chores too. I get really bored w/kid stuff.

Why are all these reasons about sex. I dont get it at all. Sex has never for one second entered into my decision making process about having kids and honestly I think it is kind of a poor reason. If I felt my husband was selfish enough to not want kids because he might get less sex Id say screw him, thats what internet porn is for (just joking) There are so many more intellegent reasons for not having kids though, and for having them. Also you will stay have time for sex if you have kids, afterall most people have siblings. What about hte money, the time, the fact the kid will come first in everything. I think you both need to think about you want picture your life with a child and without a child and discuss it at length. Borrowing a child is a good idea but remember it wont be the same thing at all.

Brilliant, Alexandra!

It really counters the implication that if a couple is unfortunate enough to not agree on kids, that they as a couple should lean in the direction of kids. I would argue that, in reality, it should be the opposite.

Elise

SmallTown and Chaco,

Wow, what cool newbies! It's so great to have you along! You guys are awesome!

Elise
(a once-and-future Big Sister)