BellaOnline Forums Religion and Spirituality Buddhism Do Not Complain for 1 Month

I didn't make it through yesterday . It was Bob's fault again. But really of course it was mine.

Today my no-complaint day had a minor hiccup midday but is going smoothly since then At a lovely lunch with my family, I drank all my water. I asked the waitress for another one. And waited. And waited. I got fairly thirsty. So I asked my Dad if I could have his, since he wasn't drinking his. Someone at the table commented, 'hadn't you asked for a fresh glass of water?' And I said, "Yes, I asked a while ago, and she never brought it." I realized that that sounded sort of grumpy so I added "not that I'm complaining" - but really, there was a hint of a whine in there . So I will own up to that.

This thread got me thinking and now when I open my mouth to air some discontent with something, I ask myself, "What can I do differently to affect change?"

If I keep doing what I'm doing, I'll keep getting what I'm getting. To expect things to change without changing anything is dumb.

So now, I ask myself what can I do differently?

About your post above, Lisa, in a restaurant situation, I always give benefit of the doubt to the server as he/she can get busy and forgetful. It isn't complaining to repeat your request. It isn't complaining to notify the manager that one of his/her servers needs to up his game.

To me, complaining is whining, yes, but just going on and on without doing anything about the situation. Gosh, I hate that.

Lori -

Oh definitely if she had come by I would have gently reminded her. She vanished though . So I had to just sit there and wait, or get up and hunt her down, which I wasn't quite at the point of doing yet. It was easier just to steal my Dad's.

And that's what I usually do as well: Drink someone else's water since it isn't being drunk anyway!

I really need to define for myself what is complaining since not liking something or not being happy with something (as in your server's not bringing your drink) isn't really complaining, is it?

Lisa, I didn't mean to imply that you were complaining or whining about the server not bringing your water! In fact, I don't think it is complaining not to be happy with a situation.

To me, complaining is going on and on about it.

Dear Lori -

I understand that you feel it wasn't complaining .

To me, it is complaining to say something petulantly. I want to remove that negative energy from my life.

There wasn't any need for me to say it petulantly. I had my father's glass of water, I was fine, and life was OK. Yes, the waitress was poorly serving us, but I can handle that in the tip. I don't have to "sour" the table's mood too!

Wow, you have really high standards, Lisa!

You made me think even more about this. I would like to remove all negativity from my life, too. I find that I do feel negative feelings (anger, frustration, impatience, disappointment) more than I would like.

I honestly believe that I am a positive person by nature but in reality, there are far too many "un-positive" feelings that leak out occasionally.

It's funny how we see ourselves. It is good to do some honest self-reflection.

It really is moving towards a more peaceful inner self to remove all negative energy. It begins with our thoughts.

I see how saying something petulantly is a sign of inner discontent.

Wow. How enlightening for me this morning. You really do make me a better person. Thank you.

Ok so I need some help here:

Trying not to feel negative about one of our little chis bringing some poop under my desk--to eat it. I smelled something awful and looked down. ugh. REALLY?!?!

It's gone now. Lysol took care of the smell. He's just a puppy. We clean up twice a day so how this one got missed, I don't know. He gets sufficient meat in his diet and doesn't need this.

{{{Breathe in, breathe out.}}} Ok, minor, fleeting...

Lori -

Hmmm here's an intriguing article on puppies eating poop -
WebMD on Puppies Eating Poop

So if he's under a year, then it sounds like a mischievous, fun part of having a puppy. Think of your pup as a little rascal trying to tease you . And see, it's clean again!

I get the mischievous. Just not the fun part. Otherwise, I'd like more fun. But it's POO! It's POO!