BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Stuck playing mommy, hating every second...

So, my sister guilt-tripped me into watching her baby for a week. She has been taking night classes to get her teaching certificate and this week she has to shadow a teacher at a school. She doesn't have the money to pay for a day sitter, and she saves having to pay the night sitter while I'm here.

It's day 4 of 5, and I'm counting the freaking minutes until I can go home. My mood alternates between bored, annoyed, and "get me the f@#k out of here!" I'm bored because I have to watch "Rio" on a constant loop because it's the kid's new favorite movie. I really don't feel like trying to drag him and all his stuff out anywhere, so I stay trapped in the house all day. Obviously, all the normal baby stuff you have to do for them (bottles, food, diapers, etc.) is annoying, but I get beyond frustrated at other things. For instance, leak guard diapers are a joke. I'm constantly having to change his clothes/blankets/sheets because pee gets on everything. Also, he's 7 months old now, and fights everything. He kicks me (hard) while I try to change his diapers. And, I'd rather deal with a knife wielding monkey than try to get a shirt on him. He cries anytime I leave his line of sight, so even going to the bathroom or trying to get myself something to eat gets him all worked up (I HATE the sound of a baby crying). And, just to make things more fun, my mom calls me like 4 times a day to see "how we are doing." Our last conversation went like this:

Mom (in sing-songy voice): "How is the baby?"

Me: "He's still alive and I haven't sold him on craigslist."

Mom: "Oh, he's such a good boy, you should interact with him more."

Me: "Interact with him?! He's a BABY. I can only spend so much time making faces at him and dangling a plastic toy in front of his face."

Mom: "Well, now you must know how your sister feels everyday."

Me: "I knew how it feels. It sucks to have a baby, which is WHY I don't have one. I didn't sign up for this, she did. And, I somehow keep getting dragged into it."

Mom: "Well, she needs the help."

Me: "I know, and I'm here aren't I? That doesn't mean I have to like it. And, after this week, I'm not sure I'll ever agree to this again. I'd rather be tarring roofs than be here right now."

I think I'm going to have to institute the "I only baby-sit in legit emergencies" rule I had to give my brother when he had kids. This is utter misery.

-D

Dolyn you are too funny!! That DOES sound like pure misery. I find it incredulous that your mom has the nerve to say "Now you know how your sister must feel every day." Are you f*cking kidding me? The "now you know how it feels" remark should be made only when treating someone like dirt who deserves it. NOT to a CF woman who is going out of her way to help look after a baby for a WEEK. It's like society forgets that people have babies BY CHOICE (except in 3rd world countries where BC isn't available and women are still treated like dogs). So I don't feel sorry for any of them. We don't have kids because we knew what would come of it. Sheesh.

Wow...it sounds like you're being taken advantage of a bit...then expected to like it. Where is daddy in this situation? You are a way better sister than I would be.

To D.

Like swearbear said where is the father all that time.If your mom likes babies so much .why doesn't she come to your sisters appartment and help out,unless she is too old,or lives to far.

Thoughts of Compassion to you, and might the universe help you finish the last days ahead.

Wish I could help more,hang in there ,there is good karma attached to that act.

a simple buddhist named
loong

I ain't got no babies... too bad, so sad but selfish I be so why impose that on someone else ?

My sister's soon-to-be exhusband won't watch the baby on weekday nights, and only cares to see him every other weekend. He's actually going to be moving away across the country at the end of August for a new job, and my sister isn't sure he will maintain contact after that. He didn't want the baby in the first place, and now that my sister has left him, he's being even worse about the situation. As for mom, she lives too far away and works. As people keep throwing in my face, "you are unemployed right now, you have the time." It makes it hard to say no. I also got roped into hosting a bridal shower for a friend because all her bridesmaids flaked out on her. Yes, I'm currently unemployed, but I still have my own life. People seem to think my unemployment is some kind of code for, "I'm free to do your bidding."

The only person who I think should be allowed to pull the "you are unemployed card" is my husband, seeing as how he's the one taking care of me financially. Still, he never does. I've been doing most of the house work and cooking since my old job ended, but he still thanks me for it like it's a big favor (man, does he get excited to see clean socks and underwear in his drawer, lol). And, he gracious loans me out to my family anytime they want me.

So, here I am, one more day with the kid. Then, I can go home to my husband and OUR kids (aka the kitties).

bringing up kids seems really hard - one woman said she gets paid in hugs....I know I wouldn't want to do it, and listening to your story, I know I would feel exactly like you - trapped.

I was also aware that you need lots of support, and my family haven't got the time or desire to give it.
It's great you're helping out your sister, after all, who else could she go to - it's up to the family to do the 'dirty work' as friends aren't as dutifully obligated.

At least you've done your duty, and you can get some small measure of satisfaction about that.

Dolyn....you sure can tell a story in a creative and humorous way. But in all seriousness, I feel your pain and I know what you are going through. I too had to help out my sister for a while when her firstborn was a baby. It was not fun, but I did my duty to help my sister when she really needed a hand. I am glad that time in my life is over. I have no interest in caring for babies......hence I am childfree.

The comments you are receiving are utter cr@p. You did not have babies for a reason.....you don't enjoy them, and you don't want to take care of them.

How convenient that the husband who helped make the baby (whether he wanted one or not) is not of any help. I hope your sister at least goes after child support from this deadbeat who does not want to take responsibility for what can happen when you jump in the sack. Real men don't shun their responsibilities.

Hang in there......you are almost finished, and maybe you can get out of future babysitting duties!

Burt......I would not consider you selfish, but a realistic human being who has thought out the responsibility of having children very carefully, instead of doing what the norm in society tells you that you should do, or what people think is fashionable.

You made the decision that was right for you. Amen to that.

Gaynor......I would feel exactly as you said if I had babies, or had to take care of babies now..... just trapped.