BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Rude "friends" should I give another chance?

It sounds like jealousy, but on the other hand, people are really, really, hurting and to them it feels like there's no reality in sight having the economy addressed...

I can't tell you the number of readings that start with, "Am I crazy? It's bad (the economy right)?" But what's in the news is this and that or whatever...

So, given all this it's probably hard to see a new home, completely (I don't know if it is or not, but they may nick-name it that) furnished without having to pay a great deal of money.

I come from about the same background as you've described. My dad was a doctor, retired though. And my friends always competed. Me, lol? I just felt like a dork watching because everyone was miserable in the end, you know? So I'd go to the lake...peaceful.

If it's that they're hurting financially, that's tough because if you're not deep/close friends to begin with, then there's not a lot you can do...maybe take an interest asking about them, their lives, have a down-scaled get-to-gether, with a theme, like bring the Christmas gifts you can't really use, wrap them up and have someone pick a number from a bag associated to the gift and maybe it's just what they need.

I can't help myself, I always give someone that may not have been the best of friend at the time, the view that maybe it was just hard times and it'll be different. BUT, if they continue painful get-to-gethers, associations that aren't good for me, I back away a little at a time.

I like your post, because you're looking into reasons that could contribute to the behavior. Our household income last year was maybe 45k (husband in newer in his field and I freelance)...each of there's was over 70k. In terms of our place at the time, if you must know, it was an apartment with used furniture! It was nice though, and the furniture was nice, too. However, it wasn't fancy. They're plenty wealthy, just hateful lol! I feel like you, though. I don't want to compete. I want to enjoy life, and be thankful for what I've had, and pass the good onto others whenever I can.

Believe it or not, a good deal of the people I'm working with have either dual incomes or roughly between the 30,000 - 70,000 and they're just not happy.

I don't mean they're bitter, but an income even at 70,000 - $100,000 is causing their households to cut back. That's hard to swallow sometimes if you're worried how you'll be perceived.

Some are really struggling with having to pretend they can still maintain the lifestyle they had 5-8 yrs ago. They don't want to show it.

Me? I went as high as maybe 47,000. So I had a foot on both sides of the fence. Never too high, not on the streets, but I could handle that if I had to.

The reason I'm sharing this is that, I'm witnessing lately a pain that's really hard for them, but it's like a secret. It's making them unhappy, with worry, pretending, etc. They want to be free again.

I'm not saying that's exactly what's going on here, but there could be some struggles not openly seen. So, even genuine happiness can be a threat, see? And lashing out can come in a multitude of ways, like criticism. It bring to them a margin of control.

I'd invite them over, if it were me.

Yes, thanks for your insight. I could see feeling that way definitely. Everyone has a certain fear in them, nowadays. Perhaps i am less open to accepting they feel that way because they've been this way since high school. The latest is, the one asked to come over during holiday break and I told her I'd get back to her. I'm feeling nervous, to be honest!