BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids The Duggars expecting their 20th child......

I just saw their announcement online. I want to throw up. My good God, she is 45 yrs old with 19 kids already. Don't these people have enough kids yet??? Is this all the woman can do with her life, be a breeding animal? I am sorry if I offend anyone here with that, but what else would you call it when there is absolutely no restraint?

This continued procreation to me is just utter selfishness. Bad enough that they are famous for having such a big family, like it is the "in" thing to be doing (TLC's "19 Kids and Counting"), but this woman is in her mid 40's now, and I don't care how healthy she thinks she is. She was diagnosed with preeclampsia more than once, the last time was with her 19th child, which by the way was born prematurely. Not to mention that the level of risk of birth defects in babies when the mother is this old is just crazy.

Why would anyone in their right mind do such a thing? And why does society celebrate it? Is their tv fame what pays for all of the births of these babies, and then their care for years afterwards?

When is enough, enough????

3 generations ago we wouldn't have thought 20 children that out of the ordinary. My grandmother was one of 17 children. The first 3 died of whooping cough and the next born were given their names. The ran a dry goods store in Baltimore and lived on the floors above. I love being with all my cousins when visiting the states and they come here on their vacations to Europe.

I have actually watched the show, and though I could by no means have this lifestyle, I can not fault them. Their children are some of the most well behaved and productive children I have ever seen. They are supported by wise investing in corporate rental properties and have absolutely no debt, not even a mortgage on their more than adequate home. They are organized, travel and are well-spoken individuals. So, though I would never have this large of a family, I would never speak negatively about a family that is doing better than most of the smaller families in America.

On this forum "Married No Kids" we are free to express our opinions, which may not coincide with opinions of parents such as yourself. Most of us who post here have chosen to be child-free, for various reasons.

I don't dislike parents with children in general. I just think 20 kids is very excessive, no matter what their financial situation is. When you have grandchildren of your own it is time to stop making babies. Just my opinion, and I am sure I am not alone in this.

Having lots of kids years ago was more common. Families didn't have money for birth control, there were farms to run and the extra hands came in handy, and sometimes religious beliefs played a part here. I am looking at the overall view of what effect having baby after baby has on society and the planet in general, and I am not so sure that having so many children is a responsible thing to do anymore for any reason.

And even if someone out there does not want to hear it, having babies for a lot of parents is just done to appease their own selfish needs. To continue to have babies when you are 45 is nothing but selfish, considering that you could subject your baby to a life of Down's Syndrome or any number of other unhealthy conditions.

Again, just my opinion.

But seriously, when is enough enough? When she has had 25 babies? Thirty babies? There is just no sense in it at all at this point.

I watched them on the Today Show and hated what I heard from the father - the oldest moved out, got married and has his own family so we have the room for this one!!!!

I agree with you Cassie. Actually, to respond to your comment " To continue to have babies when you are 45 is nothing but selfish, considering that you could subject your baby to a life of Down's Syndrome or any number of other unhealthy conditions",I believe that celebrity parents sometimes take horrible advantage of things like this when they happen. If they have adopted or ill children, that's just more free publicity for them.One more reason to have their name up in lights, or their picture on the front of some trashy magazine. Do I think they hope for their children to be sick? No, I don't. Do I think that they milk it for all it's worth, preying on the child's distress to make more money and get more pictures taken? Absolutely. Like you said, they have all these children for selfish reasons.

Let me express my views on this (although it might not be so popular amongst a lot of you). I watch "19 Kids and Counting" regularly, which I know is quite ironic for a cf person. When I starting watching them ~ 6 years ago, I thought they were nuts. But after following their story over time, I have grown to love this family. Unlike most families in the world today, they are raising well-behaved and morally upright young people that give back to society. While I don't share their views on pro-creation and some of their concepts on "courtship", I can see nothing but good, wholesome traits in the Duggars -- they have an optimism that radiates in everyone around them. And Michelle's motivation to not interfere with the child-bearing process is very much faith-based for her -- I wouldn't call it selfish. However, I do think she should have taken Josie's pre-mature birth as a sign to stop. I don't think everyone should follow her path as far as family planning goes, but then again most people don't. It seems like in the U.S. anyway, there are large families that balance out the lack thereof with childless families, like many of us.

I am not insinuating that the Duggars are bad people. But at some point common sense and the health of the babies have got to come first, no matter what higher power you believe in or how strong your faith is. A human body can only do so much.

It is medical fact that after the age of 35 the quality of a woman's eggs goes down, and continues to go down quickly with each passing year. It does not matter how physically fit a woman is otherwise. It is just how the body works. There are only so many eggs to be had, and the eggs Mrs. Duggar has left are not good quality at this point. To take a chance like she is doing at her age to me is foolish and selfish. Any doctor knows that, but I am sure her doctor is enjoying getting paid to see her through all her pregnancies.

I won't go into the risks and complications to an unborn baby again, let alone the complications that could occur with the mother at age 45. She could die. It may not happen often to a 45 yr old woman, but the chance is there. Who would take care of all of her children then? Why is she not satisfied and happy with the family she already does have, and conserve her health so she can be a part of her children's lives for years to come?

I wonder how the women who can't conceive at all and who would give anything for just one baby of their own feel about this.....

Sure, it is the Duggars' choice to keeping popping out baby after baby, but I think it is in excess and selfish, plain and simple. As always, just my opinion.

Cassie: I have to agree with you: I think this is pretty messed up. I get other peoples quibbles about this, Yes, families DID used to be larger in the past (no birth control=high amount of births, go figure) Plus, people used the kids to help run family businesses, so many kids= many workers who work for free. Makes sense. This is NO LONGER the case though. I dont watch the show. I dont care for kids, so it has no appeal to me. Im sure they are sweet nice people. Still,its hard for me to find them to be genuine when they star in thier own Reality show. And dont give me the whole, "Oh, they didnt ASK for the fame, it came to them" Well, they didnt say No to either. Frankly, with that many children, they may have needed some money to help pay for them all. Anyway, I think youre right Cassie. She's putting herself and her child at risk by making this decision. She has 19 kids to love and a husband....its amazing to think she wants more. Is there such a thing as "Child Hoarding?" Does TLC have a show about it yet? lol I read an article about the founder of Planned Parenthood, Margaret Sanger. In the article I read it stated that Sanger became such a proponent of planned parenthood because of her mother: you see, her mother was quite religious and went through 18 pregnancies in 22 years. (11 lived) Her mother died at the age of 45 from cervical cancer, and Margaret felt that the pregnancies had a direct effect. I dont see how they couldnt in some way. Pregnancy is very hard on the body. What if Mrs Duggard suffers the same fate? If she dies prematurely, she will leave 20 people without a mother.... I think its INSANITY! But, hey, that me.

My question to them is, who is going to take care of them if BOTH parents die?

I have nothing against them having a 20th child, but....

Next, how does her body do this?????

Does she like pain....

Hats off to her - better her than me!