BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids push ring? really? seriously?

I just came back from hanging out with some friends. one of my friends is pregnant and brought us pictures of what she would like her push ring to look like. (these rings were not cheap either.) I got quiet and let her and a couple other friends discuss this.

perhaps I am wrong here, but I just dont understand the "push ring". if you need a push ring for having a baby, aren't you then accepting payment? why is this expected now among some mothers to be? If you need a present for having your baby, perhaps people should rethink who they consider to be the selfish ones. shouldn't your payment for "pushing" be the child you wanted?
It sickens me that some mothers need all these presents and special treatment because they are pregnant or raising children. give me a freakin break!

OMG, my great-great-grandma would just die all over again if she knew about this stuff, lol. She had 13 kids (12 lived to adulthood), and she was known for saying that mothers nowadays (her nowadays, not ours) complained way too much. She used to say that she didn't understand why they always felt busy. Apparently she never felt busy or felt like she was overworked. Granted, she probably had the kids do most of the work, but still. She would freak if someone ever mentioned a push ring to her I'm sure. So if you have a c-section, the ring goes back? I'm confused.

Like you, I think the "reward" for pushing should be the fact that you have a kid now, and also that labor is over. Sheez. I used to teach junior high, and my students would often ask me what reward they would get for showing up to class on time. I guess this is the same mentality as my junior high students.

When I was a baby, the baby got a gold ring. I think my mom got a couple of days off from taking care of my brother while she was in the hospital after having me.

I was reading the recent post scroll and kept wondering what a push ring was so I had to visit and read this. I'm glad you explained it because I thought it was a special contraption to deliver a baby that the mom got to take home as a keepsake (I'm thinking gross!). LOL. My jaw still dropped when you explained it though. Do they have a special tacky jewelry commercial for that yet playing on the TV? Instead of the classical music for anniversary diamonds what do you think they'd play?

Yes the only thing I expected and hoped for was the gift of a healthy baby and of course I always hoped my husband made it to the hospital on time.

And our great-great-grandmas, I don't even think some of them got the day off, many went back to work right away.

I agree with you completely and thank you! I know there are a few mothers in the world who do expect special treatment and presents cause they are mothers. My older sister is one of them. Sometimes she even says so herself that she had kids just to get things. It's really selfish and pathetic.

OMG....I am sickened!!!

I agree with all of you....this is utterly ridiculous!!! And I never even heard of such a thing until I read about it here, but I certainly can believe it, when you take into account the selfish and materialistic mentality of society in general today.

This is one of the reasons why it is a turn-off for a lot of us to hear about all this baby making. With a lot of people having a baby is for all the wrong reasons to begin with......selfishness being the main reason. And those with the "baby" mentality have the nerve to call the child-free people selfish. Good God, they are really making themselves look bad now.

Go figure.....

Just got done reading the NY Times article -- just utter nonsense -- even the name of this sounds ridiculous. As if expectant mothers aren't "blessed" enough by people over and over again while they're pregnant. Do people forget that they are making this "ultimate sacrifice" of childbirth BECAUSE THEY WANT TO? It's almost like we're equating new mothers to our troops overseas.

I just feel for all of those poor women who want to but can't conceive. They already have to suffer in just being around their expectant friends and watching them get all the praise just for having good fertility.

All I have to say is that these husbands better enjoy that moment of presenting a "push" ring during labor, because it will be the romantic moment they will get for a LONG TIME!

Regarding the woman who said the ring symbolized her kids: Um, the kids are present and right there to be seen, heard, etc. So they don't need something to symbolize them. When I had a miscarriage, my mom bought me a teardrop pendant to symbolize the loss. The child is NOT there and never will be, and the teardrop sort of memorializes it for me since no one else on the planet wants to acknowledge pregnancy loss. I don't wear the pendant very often, but when I do, I feel like maybe my mom sort of understands me. It is very different to have a token that symbolizes something that is not there. Besides, wouldn't a mother's ring serve the purpose of symbolizing her kids? Do they still make those anymore?

And Beth_M, thank you for your post. When I was trying to have a child (tried almost 10 years) and couldn't, it was very hard to see everyone else have one, two, three, four, five, during those years. At one point, 14 of my friends were pregnant. It is painful, but the infertile are not allowed to speak up. I'm divorced now and have become childfree (no longer childless), but I still feel a special place in my heart for those ladies who are struggling silently. It's always nice to see that someone else thinks of them too.

happy one.....I have chosen not to have children, but I can understand that it must be very hard for a woman who really wants a baby and can't conceive. It must be heartbreaking. I hate to say it, but sometimes people can be so insensitive when one is suffering.