I agree with what other women have said, communication, respect, love etc.
One huge thing that I have realized in my current relationship that was so different than some other relationships was the compatibility of conflict resolution skills. We both had our way with working through each others defenses in ways that were needed in order to feel respected and safe. We are different people, but understood enough about the other in how to confront the issues in ways that would promote acceptance of viewpoints and feelings. We both had those moments in disagreement when, I came around or she came around to really understanding the issue in a broader perspective.
Another thing for us growing together as a couple was respecting autonomy and individuality. We enjoy our own hobbies, friends, music, book styles etc along with sharing some of these interests together.
And last the big thing that is helpful in our relationship was the similar values we have. We have been broke together, had money together and still had laughter (even if it was over a 99 cent bacon cheeseburger at Wendys). If her family needed help or my family needed help we were on the same page in loyalties. We have had differences with parental styles but have learned from each other and always with the value of family first. We see things differently spiritually but with the intrinsic belief that all human beings have value and significance, their right to the journey of belief, experience, seasons, and expression.
Those were big things for me.
Last edited by GoodMorningSunshine; 04/23/11 03:15 PM.
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