BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Invited to the babyshower of a stranger...

This is crazyness. So, Monday at work the invitation for the baby shower of a coworker's wife got circulated around (you heard right, not one for each of us, one for all to share). I don't really know the guy well, and I've never even met his wife. I politely passed it on, when my friend/coworker asked, "Are you going to go?" I respond, "No, I've never even met so-and-so's wife. I'm sure it's meant for others." She says, "Oh, you should go! She's really nice. Plus, you know him, so it'll be okay." Um... WTF? Who goes to a stranger's baby shower? Who invites strangers to a baby shower? I looked at the invite, read it, and said, "oh well, can't go anyway, I've got tickets to a concert." (That's not lie; I really was going to be busy anyway.)

Cut to Friday, my coworkers ask me to chip in $50 for a present. ::sigh:: So I did. Now, logistically, this isn't a big deal to me. I do have $50 to spare (childfree = extra money). But, for the love of Pete, where does it end?! Just cause I've met you, I have to be involved in your procreation rituals? I've barely said 5 words to this guy, and I've never even met the woman!

I don't know if there was an actual point to this post, just had to rant.

Oh, also, I know this woman who just had a baby shower for her 4th kid. I'm not well versed on etiquette, but isn't that considered tacky?

$50.00???? a piece? Where do you work a the the mint. That is an alwfully large amount of money to be asking anyone to contribute. If you don't know someone and don't feel like chipping in then don't and sounds like you are feeling you will be judged. Just tell them it's against your religion. (LOL) Seriously sometimes things like this get out of hand in the work place. There is nothing wrong with you not contributing if for one you barely know the person and you don't wish to ans should not feel pressured by anyone into doing so. MHO.

I understood everything but the last sentence, but I actually agree with you.

Especially at work, behind closed doors, at home I've heard people actually say, "The more people we invite, the more loot we'll get." Not only do I hate that concept but I can't stand baby showers. It hurts my head just thinking about it.

How excited can you get over someone elses baby booty?? And forget the games...I didn't want a baby shower AT ALL! My husband then family insisted and I had never contemplated a labotomy before but even self inducing would have been acceptable.

I just don't like the double standard. If you have kids, in general, you're expecting every single person from the groccery store that passes you to co-workers and second cousins twice removed to share the same level of excitement that you have. Then why (for the love of pete did you say?) aren't you just as eager to participate in the excitement of other people's freedom to explore life in other ways, like traveling or investigating a life long career?

I don't know how many co-workers you have but at $50.00 a pop?Given today's economy that seems like an awful lot? Maybe it's just bad in our neck of the woods?

I wouldn't have gone either. You handled the situation well, with etiquette

I don't even like going to my friends baby showers so I sure as hell wouldn't go to a strangers. I go to showers for my friends to be a good supportive friend, but going to a strangers would be torture. Anything to do with babies/kids bores me and the games are stupid. And I agree with everyone else....$50 is insane!!!

Apparently, we are getting her the stroller she wants. Indeed, there aren't that many of us, and everyone else knows them well. I suppose $50 could be considered pretty pricey, but I've spent plenty more than that on my friends and family's showers. I guess we are all doing okay money wise, and consider ourselves lucky.

I guess you can have a baby shower for any number of babies. We don't have baby showers in the UK, but I would most certainly not fork out $50/�25 for a baby of someone I do not know very well. Maybe I am mean but I had to buy everything I needed for both my kids, no one helped me.

Yes I am mean lol. I would want a ride in the stroller for that money!

People who will do just about anything for gifts.

Yes, it's tacky all the way across the board.

A person like my cousin who invited strangers to her wedding to get loot and invited a person she has hated since she was old enough to form the sentence "I hate you" (me) to a baby shower 5 hours away. Someone who needs money and bragging rights to feel whole.

And, on the subject of tacky, my mom works with a girl who had a baby Sept '09 and got a bunch of stuff from her baby shower and gave it all away. She got pregnant again soon after and expected her coworkers to have another shower and re-buy the stuff she gave away.

When I was deciding whether or not to have a wedding reception, most people told me I should because of "all the presents!" Is it possible that these people are only having babies to get others to give them things? LOL! I think 50 bucks is too high for a pitch-in, especially for someone you barely know. You were indeed diplomatic, though. I'll have to make a list of "got tickets for a concert that day" type excuses for when such situations arise :)

That is crazy! I don't even go to showers anymore for people I do know. I have always found it odd that people ask you to buy them stuff, via a registry, for a life decision they have made. If they can't afford the stuff that goes along w/having a kid, why have one and have others foot the bill? It's so odd on so many levels. Linda, the UK doesn't have baby showers? Yet another reason UK rocks!