BellaOnline Forums Relationships Gay/Lesbian Relationships How to tell if relationship is over

Hi all...... Just need to vent and get some honest advice. My girlfriend and I have been together a year and a half. The first year was great- tons of great sex, lots of laughs truly enjoying each others company. In July I had a spinal fusion surgery and unfortunately recovery has been slow, nerve damage was done to my right L5 nerve. And I am in huge amounts of pain alot of the time. My 13 year old came to live with usabout a month ago. I understand that this is alot for her and having a child around is all new to her, but my gut instinct is telling me she wants out. She makes references to sex like she's all excited for it when we go to bed....then nothing. I am afraid that she feels trapped and wants out but is afraid to tell me. We sit in the same room in the evening and she is buried in her computer. Tonight she told me that basically o am miserable to be around- partly true I am so frustrated with this nerve damage and slow back recovery. I can't even drive! Talk about loss of dependence! I could just use some feedback... Thanks for listening

Maybe she's just having a hard time adjusting. Her gf is frustrated, miserable and dependent. A teenager is now living at the house. You both just need time to get over this. Be honest with her. Tell her that you know you're miserable and having a hard time adjusting to all the changes and acknowledge in how you think she may be feeling as well. Dont assume the worst. All relationships have their ups and downs. Communication will be your best friend right now. Give yourselves a break and maybe try and lighten up the mood somehow. Do something special for her. You know her best!

It sounds like you need to have a heart-to-heart with your girl. And maybe have a therapy session. And sometimes it really helps to talk when sex is hard to come by--to talk about it before you're in bed feeling rejected and hurt.

I usually trust my first instincts.

After that, I either try to offer a fixation, talk or retreat after all of the above haven't offered a solace.

There's a scene in "As Good as it Gets" where Helen Hunt goes to check on her son who's having an asthma attack and the guy she's on a date with says, "It's a little bit too much reality for a Sat. (or maybe it's fri.) night."

That's kinda the feeling I get here.