BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids What is your focus, if you are child-free?

I read an article today about a woman who couldn't have kids because she'd had a menopause at 28.
She said she wanted children because 'for a woman it is a rite of passage.'

Does she mean like in Africa, where the young men of some tribes have to kill a lion before they become a man ?

I felt sorry for her, because she obviously feels distraught at not being a 'real woman.' BUT brainwashed or what !

It's funny, the more I read things like this in the press, the more I feel we are always going to be in the minority.
As you said firegirl, these people who go with the flow like sheep, are just sad.
Can't they think outside the box ?

Gaynor, I saw that too, what a load of codswallop :-D

I have a lot of focus points. -Drawing -Painting -Making Friendship bracelets -Collecting Pokemon Cards (11 years put into that collection and many more to come) -Gaming -Pets -Family (my parents exclusively) -My Japanese comic collection (another long standing collection, some of those books are out of print now) -Japanese Animation Figures (a recent collection but most are very rare, and very expensive too) -Traveling -Learning at least two of a list of languages: Korean, Japanese, Chinese, Finnish, Romanian and Italian. -Moving to New York or some other big city like Norfolk or Richmond maybe even the District of Columbia. I miss the city life *sigh* So I have enough to fill my plate full, besides that there are things I'd like to own, like the complete DVD collection of some of my favorite tv shows, and of course different movies as well. Not to mention how many child-free literature I really want to read and own! Trust me my life is filled with things I've yet to accomplish! I also understand how it feels to be the odd-man out, my cousin's got a kid, all my friends have children, so I'm left lonely on the outskirts wishing I could find some like minded friends locally but like with you Jilly, most of the people here seem hellbent on procreating. Probably becuase there is nothing better to do around here than eat, sleep, procreate, and sell drugs.

Life, like others have stated, is my focus. Every day is a new adventure. Try not to feel depressed about your friends and their choice to have children. Easier said then done I know! It also helps to live in a more urban area where minivans and PTA meetings aren't the norm. I've moved a ton over the last 10 years or so and started to get stir crazy in our country house even with a job and grad school. So happy to be back in a city where I won't get asked every day if I have kids or when am I going to, etc.

"Life, like others have stated, is my focus."

I like that Madge :-)

Felt the urge to comment on this thread today, because I am nearing the end of a week-long vacation with my husband. We shopped for Christmas decorations and home improvement projects, prepared the entire Thanksgiving dinner for his family ( two days of cooking - could not have accomplished that on my own with a bunch of little ones running around), decorated for Christmas, watched movies, listened to music, drank a lot of wine, stayed up as late as we wanted and slept in as late as we wanted. I know my friends/family who have children could never have the vacation that we just had. A whole week with just the two of us, and we stayed perfectly entertained the entire time. So, the answer is no, you don't have to have children to fulfill your life and keep you busy. We do a great job entertaining ourselves!