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#623011 09/01/10 03:07 PM
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Chipmunk
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How do you handle a teenager who cannot make up her mind on what she likes to do? Every few weeks she changes her mind on what interests her. This causes us to not spend too much money on anything she is interested in since it doesn't last long. She gets very upset about this.

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That is typical behavior for a lot of teens who are exploring their talents, interests and possibilities. In fact, most teens tell me that their biggest fear of the future is having to settle on one path (choose a college major, career, etc.).

I can understand how you don't want to invest a lot of money on something she'll drop in a few weeks. Make her a deal. You'll support her exploration of different activities but she'll have to help fund them. This way, if she has a financial investment, she'll be more careful in selecting an interest. Plus, anyone can tell you how teens will appreciate something more if they purchased it versus it being given to them.

Strike a bargain as to how much she'll chip in or what your financial limits will be for any given activity. Have her learn to earn her activities. Her true passion will surface when you see her investing her time, talents--and own money--into an activity.


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Your insite is right on the money (no pun intended). A good rule of thumb that worked in our house - you finish what you start.
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I know what you mean ! one week horses the next dance ! we can't do everything, I have paid for a couple of taster courses in various things - 6 weeks usually is enough to decide if they like it or not ! then you don't have a large outlay of cash !

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Rebecca,
That's the "thing" with teenagers as Lori said, they are still trying to experiment and discover their likes and dislikes, unfortunately when the experiment costs money, it can be challenging.

Sometimes I try to find a free version of the activity or sometimes organizations will let you do a "trial" version. That way they can determine if they like it before the outlay of cash. Unfortunately sometimes the answer just has to be "no".

I think it's typical teenage behavior. Some adults are just as indecisive too....lol...


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Elephant
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That is great advice Lori. I'm having this issue right now with band. The only thing is my son isn't quite a teen yet so I'll have to figure out another way for him to pay (he he he).


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I would simply stop spending money on her. Make her get her own job if she does not already have one and start paying for her own things. This teaches responsibility.


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