BellaOnline Forums Relationships Gay/Lesbian Relationships Kissed a girl for the first time and...

...I'm married with children and so is she! This is the craziest thing. I think we have both thought at times that we're crazy, but the more I read and explore, the more I realize that this is more of a common occurrence than I had originally thought. Neither of us have ever had a lesbian/bisexual relationship before and although we've both admitted at times we might have been curious, never acted on anything. Now, we're married have kids and what started out as a platonic friendship has evolved into something so much more involving love, physical intimacy, and a deeper understanding of each other. What to do... Anyone ever have a similar experience?

well, cheating is cheating. you either end it or break it off with your husband ..that is, if you're looking at this as a problem. if not, enjoy!

Hey citiigirl, thanks for your response. Of course this is posing somewhat of a problem. Personally, I've been honest with my husband from the outset, but it still doesn't make it easier. That's why I was wondering if anyone else had ever been in this situation. What did you do? What was the ultimate outcome? I don't have any want to leave my husband...yet, I'm not ok with giving this part of me up either. Such an internal dilemma.... Thanks

i had a virtual 'friend' who had an open-minded husband. she was able to date women from time to time and he had no issues with it. im not sure what you meant with "being honest with the husband from the outset.." does he know about her? would he accept if you were to express your thoughts/feelings?

Yes and yes. He knows who she is because we were very good friends before this all happened. For some reason or another, something sparked this summer and before anything got physical with me and my friend, I told him I was having feelings. After it happened, I told him that what I thought would just be an experiment turned into something more. He's been very accepting and non-judgmental, I'm just wondering how long that will last. I love him dearly, but this relationship I'm in with this woman is SO incredibly different. She is also married and her husband is not very accepting of anything. It's a hard situation. I'm taking it day by day. Trying to cope with the situation, as well as try to sort out what I've learned about myself in the past few months regarding my sexuality and what I want in life.

In that case, I think it's great (for you)! I came out last year to my family/friends and I'm in my early 30's. It's a great feeling.. but I can't say I'm gay (just yet). I'm in a wonderful relationship with a woman who know lives with us (my child and I) so things are looking good. If your husband is supportive, I think you have yourself someone wonderful. Congratulations!

The book, Dear John, I Love Jane: Women Write About Leaving Men for Women, is a collection of stories written by women who have gone through experiences like yours. And several stayed with their husbands; they just opened up their relationships to adjust to this new development. It's so great that your husband is giving you the space to experience this without a lot of resistance. Enjoy.

My hubby has told me many times that I am welcome to have a relationship with a woman if I want one. I do think about that sometimes!

The kids usually wind up most hurt in the end.