BellaOnline Forums Health and Fitness Pregnancy Fiancee left me when pregnant

I was engaged last year and planning a wedding for this spring. In January I found out I was pregnant, when I told my fiancee he got upset and asked me to move out and wanted nothing to do with the baby. Needless to say it's been a very hard thing to deal with, but now out of no where he wants 50% custody, now that I'm due next month. Like I need more stress. I'm trying to figure out what a judge would say about this because, he has said I should've had an abortion in the past, how I killed everything,etc. Any advice?

Hi Dorothy,

I can't imagine all of the emotions running through your life as a soon to be mom in action.

If this goes to court it will almost certainly end with shared custody. If he says he's the father and you acknowledge that, then joint it will be. The judge will also take a look into finances and how the father will be supporting the child. In general, it's usually 20% of whatever income the person makes in terms of support.

If you can't afford an attorney, I'd look into legal services your county offers. Often arrangements can be made if done early enough to find representation fre or on a scale, meaning based on how much income you have coming in.

If the father is hostle to you in general, the child is apt to be caught in the middle. You may want to include in the custody arrangements, specified times, places and counceling. Sometimes these things can turn into a power struggle, again at the child's expense.

Do whatever you can to work with the dad if at all possible and run all of this by people who can support you while you are recovering.

Even if you don't go to court, I highly recommend something in writing that both of you sign as well as having it certified by a notary to prove what is in the contract is something you have read and signed after agreeing to it.

Emotions can rise and fall to great extremes and to protect everyone involved having a piece of paper to refer to, even if someone says to you, "We don't need a piece of paper between us." Get one anyway it will serve everyone in the long run

My ex is very controlling and manipulative. I belive the only reason why he wants custody is to ultimatly be in control. He doesn't want to have to pay child support and wants to save face and not look like a bad guy in front of work people and friends. I do not believe he even really wants to be part of the baby's life, he's just trying to be in control. He has a son from a previous marraige who is older who believes that his dad was unfit then and is still unfit to raise a child. My ex makes good money and I don't do too bad myself, so I think this will end up in court most likely. Any opinions are welcomed!

leave his way make your way every life has his own path you will also get a new light of life be self dependent try to forgot the past and see new winds of life is coming along the way.The women has many power do not loose heart. Show to your fiancee you have your own power show him women power so he can not ditch another women.