BellaOnline Forums Family 12 Step Recovery Can anyone answer my questions about usage?

I have a few questions to anyone that has ever smoked crack or knows the symptoms, I have tried to research this online and didn't get very far. Here's the situation An older woman I know has given me reason to suspect that she is smoking crack but I'm not exactly sure since I have never seen any proof. She is an older white woman NOT a street person kind of on the heavy side that has a well paying job, she is not a thief, no criminal record and she has a teenage son that she supports along with alot of bills. I guess I would call her the average middle class single mother not exactly well off but lives in a house with the picked fence, drives an SUV and a few pets. Her ex-husband IS a crackhead the average street person who steals, has a long list of criminal records, looks skinny and shagy, and smelly but she is not in contact with him at all and they do not get along at all. I started suppecting that she was smoking crack when I was at a party with her at her friends home. I had entered the kitchen and her and her friend both were scattering/moving around very quickly like they were hiding something I also saw her reach into her jacket pocket when this happened. It then became very quiet which was out of the ordinary and odd. I have gotten her alone on several occasions and asked if she was using she became very angry and deffensive, perhaps a little too deffensive and a bit hostile. Another time I was visiting playing video games with her son in the basement and when I went upstairs to use the restroom she was in the dinning room it smelt like something was burning like a faint gas smell but very strong, I got really light headed from the smell and when I asked her she said it was the stove but the stove wasn't on, plus her stove is electric not gas. She does seem paranoid some times but it's not the sterio typical paranoia looking out the window, it's different and really hard for me to discribe in words. She can seem a bit hostile and depressed at times idk if this could be stress related or if it's drug use and I'm not sure how I can find out if she won't admit it? Lately she has been having problems breathing/respitory which I read can be caused from smoking of any kind, she doesn't smoke ciggarets but used to for about fifteen years has been off for at least 7years. She also had a vien break in her leg causing her to bleed inside of her leg leaving a bruise on the outside. Can this be severe crack related? She also accuses her son ALOT of taking her things, such as her wallet or keys and sometimes money which he has know clue what she is talking about, but she will throw a fit slamming doors and acting very childish until she finds what ever she misplaced. Old age or crack? She does have serious medical heart problems as well which could be due to smoking crack, is there any way to find out for sure? She is not very tidey her son is usualy cleaning up after her and she is alway tired which she blames on being bitten by a lime tick over 10yrs ago. This woman has distanced her familiy completely her son questions it all the time. It's always the blame game with either sides between her and her relitives and to me there arguments seem pointless and meaningless. Yet she doesn't seem to have that many friends and tends to tell off alot of people like road rage except not driving. these are all the reasons I have to suspect, is there anything else I should look for? (If there are pipes they are very well hidden as we've looked and found nothing) What do you think?

I've always been told 2 things. One, if it ain't your business leave it alone. Take care of your side of the street. Two,If her business is interfering with yours, distance yourself if possible.

You could mention your worries to the SPCA. I did this via a remailer site to stay anonymous when I had my suspicions about a pawnshop owner in Orlando. if nothing else the animals would be under protection and the Society might be able to help the person. When I went back the following year the Iguana who had been in distress was in excellent health, and the shop and owner were much cleaner and wholesome Pets can be a powerful lever to enable their owner to accept help.

I agree with CC304. If you are not a family member, if this woman's life does not interfere or even connect with yours, then let it go. I would not call about the animals either unless you see them being mistreated. You know what you can do? If you are a praying person, say a few prayers for her. Put her in God's hands and move on.

But, it is nice that you care enouygh.

Blessings,
Kathy L.

Ah ...the classic do I do something or do I do nothing and hope it sorts itself out or goes away? Ultimately only you can decide what your choice will be.

I'm a big fan of the "for evil to triumph it only needs good people to stand by and do nothing". Mainly because most of my 'sticking it to the bad guys' have been wins and the rest moving things along to a positive solution. However my background is quite unique (see my bio for details) and from an early age I have been exposed to psyops, strategy and tactics, and other techniques for getting the job done with minimal risk to myself and, now, my loved ones. For example in the past I have helped the police take down several drug groups in different areas of the country by providing appropriate information and not using any direct action or anything that could be traced back to me.

Done right, using influence, and I include petitioning the Divine (prayer) in that category, it is possible to guide the outcome to be the one you want. Rather than taking risks or drawing attention to yourself you can make others do the work for you by applying a little bit of thought.

Ultimately though the decision rests with your and your conscience as it is up to each person to decide what is right an appropriate. No-one can make that choice for you. Whatever happens you will have to live with that decision

to Yin Yang,

I have been sober for 35 years now, I remember being told by my
sponsor of the time,:do not waste your time with those who do not want to stop,give your time and ear to the ones that want to stop.

loong