BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids ugh... dont feel sorry for me because I dont want

I guess I'm not very fertile then!

lol thanks guys... yeah the oopsie comment left me just...incredulous! I love that, "the day i have a baby is teh day teh world runs out of wire hangers..":P sorry about typos I am trying to type while i have my daughter on my lap... a precocious calico with a penchant for sitting on lap tops :)

I think I may have some insight into this. I have done alot of research on birth control.

no birth control is 100% unless you actually have the reproduction organs removed. that is why they always say 99%. so there is the possiblity that for 1 person out of 100 that it may fail them at some point. the human body can be very resilant and even mend tied or cut tubes making that person fertile again.

birth control pills for example, may work better for some people rather than others. human make up and body chemistry vary from person to person in a billion different ways while there are only a handful of different pill types.

when birth control fails a woman, it can be a very tramatic expiriance. my heart goes out to any woman who finds themselves in this situation. they can do everything right and yet the pill or condom or for forth may not do as it is supposed to. I dont believe anyone posting here has had a "oops" that they secretly wanted. and I dont think anyone wanted an oops so they could exercise their right to have an abortion.

I think what Shnicky might have been trying to say is that there are some people out there who will intentionally create an "oopsie" for selfish reasons.(even though it is not an oopsie at all) and since they are playing the oopsie card, people (like, say, a husband who just said no more kids, or said lets wait to have kids)cant get mad and blame them...because it was an oopsie.

I must say that, although I don't deny that there are contraceptions failures out there (1%), I agree with you that most "oopsies" we hear about are just not for real. That came up in another thread, some people have those oopsies because they are not so totally against having children as people in this forum are and they are not so careful with birth control. Example: a friend of mine got pregnant in her honey moon. She said she felt awful and stupid for letting it happen because she had just moved out from her parents house and wanted to enjoy some freedom before starting having children (very traditional family). Well she had the child, and another one next year and she just celebrated her 10th anniversary with four kids. How does that qualified as a real "oops"? Not at all, probably she was just not using birth control, just hoping she wouldn't get pregnant yet. It was just to embarrassing to tell everybody that she was pregnant after having told everybody how she wanted to wait and enjoy time alone with her husband.

I never understand what people are thinking when they get pregnant by accident and then you ask, were you on birth control? and they say, well...no. Because-and here come the excuses-I was in between relationships, it just happened, we were drunk, we didn't think about it at the time, we tried to be careful, he pulled out, I didn't think I would get pregnant, etc. I understand birth control fails, and I feel sympathy for those few who did everything right and still had a pregnancy, but what about all the others? Maybe they aren't careful on purpose? As for me I always had a healthy fear of pregnancy and did everything I could to prevent it!

My answer would have been "really? you are praying for an abortion? Because that would been the very next step after finding out I was pregnant!"

I must be infertile too. Been married 9 yrs, and I take my birth control pills on a military general's clock -- every day, within 15-minute accuracy. I also didn't believe that one could get pregnant even on a perfect birth control record.

Seriously...when I was much younger I used to double up on birth control methods because we all know none are 100% effective, and like I wanted to be a teen mom. Meanwhile everyone I know who "accidentally" got pregnant fell into one of the categories moonsammy and Solalux described.

I have a friend who just got pregnant and her way of announcing it to me was "whelp, the rhythm method doesn't always work.." No duh! I suspect that it was an accidentally on purpose....which is fine...I'm happy for her. But, I get a lot of sympathies and "oh, you'll change your mind". I've been married 2 months!

Yep, if she used the rhythm method as a form of birth control, she really wasn't serious about trying to prevent pregnancy. Quite immature IMO.

cp