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Court was today and the judge set the next court date for October 9th I think. He didn't say anything other than ordering a hair folicle test for her and her boyfriend that is living in the home with her. So we will just have to wait and see what happens.

Hi GrannyH and Connie!

GrannyH,

I'm laughing about the weather--I live in the south (North Carolina), but I LOVE winter weather. Granted, I don't have the winter weather you have, so I say that lightly, lol!

I don't mind the heat as much, but when the humidity gets so high it makes it hard to enjoy anytime outside (even our dog doesn't like to romp around in the yard that much, lol).

It sounds like you have a bit of a break from Granny Day Care! What are some of your hobbies that you like to do in your free time?

Connie, how are you doing? What did you think about the court hearing--was it what you had expected? Have there been any further visits planned according to the agreed upon plan?

I am sending tons of positive thoughts and lots of prayers your way!

I am fine Brandii, I really didn't expect much out of court. We felt like the judge would accept the plan set forth in the meeting the other day. We are sticking to the Mon-Wed-Fri visits, I feel that the time is flexible. She is supposed to come at different times to learn MJ's schedule.

My other grandaughters dad died the other day, he drowned in the Iowa River. So it is weird now that none of my 3 grandaughters have a father. Tiffany didn't really know her dad and typical of a 5 year old when she heard he died in the river she asked if alligators had eaten him! She had spent the night with us the day she found out and told me she was a little sad her real dad had died.

Where to begin???

Brandii: A long time ago when I was employed, my boss would introduce me as follows: "If there's anything you what to know, just ask Soni. She's a jack of all trade, but master of none." That was true in my professional career and also in my personal life. I usually have six or seven things going at a time, but nothing sticks out as having more importance than anything else. I just do lots of things to keep me busy and when I'm done with a project I will go onto something completely different. My big projects right now involve quilting; and that is where I first met Connie at these forums.

I have lived in the south. When my oldest was very young, we lived in Virginia. My youngest was born in Texas. When we were out of the military, we 'ran' back north. This past week throughout the upper Midwest has been about 15 degrees below normal. The city swimming pool was closed two days because it was too cold. (62 one day) We should be in the 80's tomorrow.

Except for my grandson who was moved to a group home across the state (to keep him away from me), 3 grandkids live 4 blocks away in one direct and the 2 grandkids I do day care for live 5 blocks in the opposite direction. I've been having them about 2 days a week - and not very many hours each day. The parents are working on making them more responsible - They really are old enough. But one came here at 3 in the afternoon yesterday and asked me to make him lunch cause he hadn't eaten yet.

Connie: I was thinking about you all day yesterday. Is the hair test for drugs? Does the mother really want her daughter, or is her mother pushing her?

We are dealing with a couple of deaths, people in the 80's, but you just know that is a part of life. I don't know how to deal with the death of young people - and the effects on their children. I've always said you sound as if you could handle most of what life sends you, so I know you're be good for your grandchildren. I hope you have someone you can turn to.

Continued good thoughts to you. GrannyH

Hey Granny, wow the pool being closed for 2 days because of cold weather! I guess it is hard to imagine as we are all here melting! I did look at the 10 day forecast and no 100 degree days are expected, a few in the high 80s and that will be really nice! Hubbys cucumbers weren't setting blooms during all that hot spell and now they are back to producing. He usually makes about 100 quarts of dill whole pickles. He eats them in his lunch every day.

Your grandchildren live really close to you. That is really nice. We always lived away from my grandparents (both sets lived in the same town and my mom and dad went to school together their whole lives...they were even high school sweethearts) I always felt a special bond with them as I was the first grandaughter and I have wonderful memories of my grandparents. My parents made sure we spent time with them. So I have always tried to be like my grammas were. I still have one alive now and am very fortunate to have not lost any of my grandparents until I was in my late 20s. I am almost 41 now. I also had great grammas that I remember until I was about 18 and the 3 I had then passed away after that. One of my great grammas I remember very well as we spent lots of time with her. She was very sweet and never had a bad thing to say about anyone. My grandmother and I talked about her a lot. Sometimes I would have dreams about her and call my gramma and tell her about them. After my grandfather passed away I had a dream where he came to me and hugged me and comforted me and then told me he was counting on me to check on my gramma and make sure that she was ok. We live far away but I made sure that I called her once a week to see how she was and if she needed anything I would call my dad and tell him. She was not one to ask for help.

The hair folicle test is for drugs but I swear that they told us it would also show drinking too. The dhs dropped the ball and didn't drug test her for a few months and so now they ordered that to confirm if she was clean or not. And they told her there are ways around UA's but not the hair folicle testing. I am thinking it will go back 6 months maybe. And they are testing her and her boyfriend since they are living together. They are supposed to do that by Tuesday. So I will be anxious to see how the test turns out.

I have started seeing a counselor on Tuesdays and she told me that I have awesome coping skills. I have just always thought that you have to take what life gives you and make something good of it. Otherwise I might go crazy trying to figure out the why and how of it all. I don't know that they would let me get on the internet in the little padded cells lol. I had told my hubby before though it does sound tempting. You can hang out in your pajamas all day, someone cooks and cleans for you, all the therapy you could ever want and drugs too!

Thanks to you all for your continued support. I am very lucky that my family is very supportive so if I need to vent someone is always there to listen. I feel as if you all are my family too!

Oh, at this point I think she really does want our grandaughter back. I don't think she is having a lot to do with her mother as her mother is not very supportive of her and always telling her what to do. It is like she is still a child. Her mom was not at the court and I think that was the smartest thing she could've done as her mom was horrible at the meeting for the plan for the next 3 months. We go back to court in October on the first. So we will just have to see what happens between now and then.

GrannyH and Connie, you both are amazing grandmothers!

GrannyH, I'm still getting over the pool being closed because it's too cold! I was outside with my dog the other day, and it was so hot. My neighbor's sprinklers looked very inviting! Of course, I'd probably look a bit silly running through their sprinkler with a great big dog joyfully following behind. It was a nice thought, though!

Connie, I'm so happy to hear that your counseling is going well. It's about time you have a third party that's there for you and you only.

Once again, your sense of humor is the best! If they lock you away, I'll send you print outs of the forum postings that you're missing.

How is your husband coping with everything now?

LOL Brandii...I will appreciate the updates!

Hubby tends to just bottle everything up and not want to talk about anything. I have tried to get him to see our doctor or go to the therapist but he always tells me that is "not for him". I figure he is going to have a meltdown sooner or later. It will be very hard for him when our grandaughter returns to her home.

I went to my mom's this weekend. I left Thursday night so I could go with my mom to see my gramma on Friday. She can't drive so mom takes her to get her hair done on Friday and we took her to eat lunch after her hairdo. It is so horrible to see her the way she is. She has lost so much weight in the last year and a half, she was wearing size 14 and is down to size 6 or less now. She has had a lot of health issues and the last time she was in the hospital we all thought she was going to die. Mom had taken her and bought new clothes a couple of weeks ago but she wasn't wearing them and I told mom to clean her closet out so they did and she doesn't have much to wear. Gramma hadn't ate for 2 days because she was having stomach issues. She did eat a good lunch, I was surprised. So after lunch we went shopping and mom helped her dress and I ran around the store and picked things to wear. She wanted pants with pockets for her kleenex and you would not belive it but I guess pockets are out. Jeans wouldn't work because she has a hard time getting them on. We spend over $800, it was fun and so hopefully gramma will be happy with her new clothes. I told her I wanted her to come and stay with me...I would even get rid of my dog (she is allergic). She was surprised I would get rid of my dog. I told her I love her and wanted to take care of her if she let me. I am sure that won't ever happen but I think she needs to know that she has some options. I think she needs a day nurse to come and stay with her and if I lived closer I would be more than happy to help out. Mom said she was surprised that gramma let me help her in/out of the car and I took her arm while we walked, helped her in her chair at lunch. I just assumed they did that with her. She told me that she usually told her she didn't need any help. I didn't ask if she needed help. Maybe I am more assertive than my mom!

My sister and I had a craft show on Saturday. She didn't do well at all and I did so so, but it was nice just to be together.

My mom has also lost a bunch of weight and so I got clothes from her and my gramma. I guess I need to hope not to gain or lose and weight for a while! I had a car full of stuff. Mom has decluttered and there was stuff to pass down to my daughter. My sister must've been in the declutter mode too and sent a bunch of toys and books and puzzles for my grandaughter.

I had a nice time but then it was sad to see my gramma so helpless. I am going to have to do a better job of keeping in touch with her and try to visit more often.

Hi Connie!

It sounds like you had a fun time with your mom and grandmother. I'm so sorry to hear about her health issues.

I'm sure she appreciated getting new clothes! As far as the pants with pockets, my grandmother has worn those for years, and I do believe that some of them have pockets.

I think they were purchased at a local dept. store here (Belk's I believe). I think there are a few online retailers as well--let me know if you still need help finding some.

As far as not seeing your grandmother as much, I know that can hard. Maybe you can mail pictures of the grandkids, house, etc., to her every few weeks? Even thought it's not the same as an in person visit, I bet she'd love to get such a fun surprise in the mail.

Tell me more about the craft show! What type of crafts did you have?

Hey Brandii, yes sending photos in the mail is a nice idea. I do send them occasionally. But I am sure I can be better than I do. We did manage to get her fixed up with pants (that even have pockets!).

My sister and I make jewelry. Her stuff is really big and lots of bling and turquoise. She did a show this weekend and sold over $400 so she felt better! I was gone to Oklahoma City with my husband and it was nice to have just me and him time. There was a vintage flea market going on and we went and I finally got a Lane cedar chest. I have been wanting one forever! And my hubby talked the lady down to $130. She originally wanted $175 but had already marked it down some. It is really nice. I also bought a composite doll from probably the 40's. She was only $12.50. She is very cute. My son thought she was really creepy lol. I am not a doll collector, but she was so cute I had to have her. We also did some shopping but mostly it was nice to get away and be alone.