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#535882 07/11/09 02:01 AM
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Journal-writing is one of the best ways I've found to cope with really rotten days or with the company of people who make a day rotten just by being a living, breathing, poison-spewing part of it. I had a boss who was one of the nastiest people I'd ever met. She was the sort who made women in management look bad. I used to wonder if perhaps she had sustained brain damage by conking her head on that glass ceiling a few too many times. She ridiculed a young girl who was a little overweight, telling her if she broke her office chair she'd take it out of her pay. Another woman at our office had fibromyalgia and osteoporosis and this boss used to make fun of the way this gal walked when she was in pain. She liked to say mean things to and about certain people aloud, unfairly criticizing things like physical appearance. She was also a bigot, and if one didn't laugh at one of her hateful remarks that she seemed to think were ever so witty, that person could expect to become her target! I became her target by inadvertently using a word on a memo that she did not know. A word that had more than one syllable. From then on, she always had something scathing to say about me and my "big words". She would say something vicious under the guise of "just a joke, hey, lighten up" while waiting for all the office toadies to laugh with her. She had certain people she loved to pick on, and these people could do nothing right. Of course she also had her coterie of toadies and brown-nosers, who could do no wrong. I was willing to bet that she had always been a bully and a mean, rotten person. Sadly, some consider these sort of folks as management material. The only way to survive a day with this dreadful woman without committing a felony or two was to imagine to myself how I would go home and write about her at the end of a day. How I would let out my outrage. I would dip my pen in vitriol and figuratively skewer her... I would consult the online thesaurus in order to come up with words adequately vicious to describe this woman's loathsomeness. You know, BIG WORDS? It was one of those small ways to get through the day. My journal helps me cope, even when I'm not actively writing. I know it's like a good friend, just there, waiting to help me.


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Lol! Your boss must be sister to my husband's boss!

:-)

Great story and encouragement - thanks for sharing.

Angela <><


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Change the woman to a man, add a few male groupies and you have just described my nightly work experience. Being the only woman makes it even tougher. It's a comfort realizing it's not just me. Comforting, but sad. It shouldn't be that way. Thanks for sharing!

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Originally Posted By: IH8FMS
Journal-writing is one of the best ways I've found to cope with really rotten days or with the company of people who make a day rotten just by being a living, breathing, poison-spewing part of it.


That is so true! I will do the same thing. I'll write "in cognito" of course, but change names etc. and pass on the venom those "living, breathing, poison-spewing " (love it!) individuals dispense on to you. I am surrounded by people like that currently. It's temporary, but they thrive on the viciousness. They truly do!. They feel angry and inept inside and slowly, like sludge or not slowly, they erupt their lava onto anyone in the vicinity. Thank the good Lord above I don't have to stay where I'm at for very much longer.

I will go as far to say, if you spend enough time around these people, even with the most positive personality, you can absolutely take on their negativety. Even if it's just them bringing you down. You've got to extract the poison!

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Last edited by Eleise - Clairvoyance; 07/13/09 02:56 PM.

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It's nice to feel so not alone, but awful to hear that there are so many others like QS of TM (I'll leave you to figure out the acronym; I used this as my code name for her in my journal but I don't dare tell you what it means here or you'd bounce me right outta here! It's real nasty.) ;-)

Last edited by IH8FMS; 07/13/09 05:03 PM.

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It sounds like a good thing that you no longer work for her! The best thing to do when you're around someone like that is to escape. Journaling is good - but it's better not to have to deal with it in the first place!

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I definitely agree that it's good not to bottle up emotion - but on the other hand to fill yourself with that kind of anger every day just isn't healthy. If you are that unhappy with the current situation you should find an actual resolution, rather than bottling up tons of anger and then spewing it all out at the end of the day ...


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Well, left that job just as soon as I could. Jobs in my area, especially for someone like me (long story) aren't too easy to come by.


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I can totally relate to this. I was bottling up my feelings about a boss who seemed to look down her nose at me. I would rather give out wrong info than email her a question or go into her office. When I started journaling about the way she makes me feel, I found myself writing stories using her as the &quot;villian&quot;. Defeating her in fiction and blasting my feelings in the journal made it easier to go to work and deal with her when absolutely necessary. Some time last year, she had made a comment about something I wrote and commented &quot;As a writer you should know better.&quot; I was offended and kept my mouth shut, but thought to myself &quot;What I write and what I do at work are totally different&quot;. There are two co managers who are good friends with me and when I mentioned this to them, they were both surprised. &quot;She raves about your writing to me&quot; they both said. So I keep my daily appointments with my journaling muse for just this reason.

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I totally hear ya! My *from heck* boss was funny that way, too. She obviously loathed me, but she "commisioned" me to write a tribute poem for our small observance of the first anniversary of 9/11. This was printed and went out all over the place.

I felt a little angry and defeated when I wrote my letter of resignation, but I wasn't about to let her know that. It's one of the things I saved in my journal.


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Doxi
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Survivors of Nearly Every Rotten Thing
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