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#536050 07/12/09 02:09 AM
Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 2
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Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 2
I've heard similar complaints on this forum, so I thought I would share my unique experience. The baby question always seems to present itself, and I really have no way to address it correctly. I have been married for eight years to the absolute love of my life. We've endured our fair share of hardships within the total ten years we've been together. After 4 years of marriage, we romantically talked of reproducing, and gave it an honest attempt. We were wholly unsuccessful. It's important to note that I am the flighty one, and he's the practical one. All of the peeing on ovualtion tests and evenonce taking my temperature was not condusive to getting in the mood. I hated every last bit of it. Meanwhile, we were travelling a lot and I began to realize that's what I wanted for my life. I truly want to check off everythng in the "1,000 Places to See Before You die" book, and so we embarked on another journey. I'm not ruling out the idea of kids all together, but for now it is absolutely not an option for me or him. We've both begun furthering our eduacation after not finding meaningful careers. I have a degree in English, which led to nothing. I have since made the decision to become a middle school teacher, and am pursuiting a Master's degree in education. I really love that age group, and would be content with that group for the rest of my life (yes, I know what I'm getting in to, I've worked with the school system for a while now). The thing is, we are beyond the point of raising eyebrows, we've been together for ten years. Those close to us know we struggled for a good two years in conceiving. However, it's impossible to explain to people that we are capable of envisioning a child-free existence and can imagine being happy doing so. The worst questions are "Are you guys still trying?" How do I respond to that? Part of me is embarassed at our weak attempt, and more than that wants to downplay that facet. Most of all, I don't know how to truly convey to people that I am extremely happy with my life, love being an extraordinary aunt, planning for teaching, and fantasize about relishing my summers on exotice adventures. I hardly ever see a baby carrier there, and when I do, we've already been married 15 years. Thoughts please!

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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 395
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 395
I would just be honest--tell them you are not still trying and have decided you realy don't need to. You are happy either way, and if it happens, it happens. If not--then you have no problem with that either.

RavynG


Se non potete resistere al calore, allora esca dalla MIA cucina.
LadyLvsNyt

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