BellaOnline Forums Family Child Abuse I was molested when I was younger

I do not recall how old I was at the time, but I remember bits and pieces of events that took place, I'm guessing I was between 8 and 10 years old. My mom worked the evening shift at the hospital, her boyfriend at the time would sometimes watch me while she was working. I was just a little girl that wore t-shirt and panties at night after my showers, I can remember he would always got me to sit on his lap and I can remember being touched and rubbed down there, he would keep his hand there like it was no big deal to him. Another time I rememer him walking into my room while i was sleeping and being awaken to him kissing and licking me down there, I was so confused I thought nothing of it being dirty at the time, I just remeber laying there wondering what he was doing that for. I woke up many times in the morning with my panties either pulled aside or down to my knees. To this day I have never told my mother and I have issues with my current BF touching me during the night.

I am so sorry to hear of what you endured. It's no wonder you still have difficulty with being touched at nighttime and I would imagine it would bring up memories from your childhood. I was wondering, have you considered going into counseling to talk with someone about what you have been through? Therapy can be very healing and beneficial.

It is so sad that anyone would have to go through this, whether once or more. I think it would help if you talked to your boyfriend and told him about what happened. It may seem a bit (sorry for lack of better word, but) weird but may help your relationship and him have a better understanding of you. When you have support and someone there to help you get through somthing such as this, the frusterations and confusions and everything else slowly starts to go away. But you have to start with talking to someone you must trust first. Good luck Laura.

Its very important for you to understand, that under no circumstance was this your fault. Alot of things that we cannot control happen to us when we are groing up, and sometimes our loved ones can't protect us. One of the reasons I won't have children myself, is becaue I see how twisted the world has become. You are not alone tho' please be careful you who share this information with. However depending on your relationship with your mom, it might help you to tell her, as she would want to walk you through this. As for your boyfriend I don't know how long you've been with him, or how trustworthy he is, but if there is a chance your relationship may not stay the distance, then you might like to be really sure he's enough of friend to hold on to this information and keep it to himself. I am really sorry to hear this..

It is especially important to be supportive to someone who's been abuse/molested.But before you get the support,you must have somebody to open up this with and the best would be your mom..If this didn't work then you might ask the help of a counselor.

Respectfully, I have to disagree with this advice. This perpetuates the feelings of guilt and "dirty secret". This is not something that you have to be ashamed or embarrassed about - because it is not a mistake of yours. Your were the innocent bystander, the victim in all of this.

The first part of Andso's advice was dead-on


It was definitely NOT your fault, and only you can tell us how much your mother was aware of. Since she was not there during any of this - it is quite possible that she did not have any idea. Do you know why she and this particular BF split up? That might help you on yoiur way to recovery as well.

We are daling with the aftermath of my daughter (11) being molested righ now. She has the same problem with night-time as you do. During the day when the sun is up, she is bouncing all over the house, happy, chattering ninety miles an hour at me. As soon as the sun goes down, she gets quiet and starts hanging a lot closer to my side. It is like a switch being thrown.

We do have her seeing a counselor (me too) and it is doing her a world of good. I was a victim of date-rape in college. On one hand it gives me the unique capabilities of being able to completely empathize with my daughter, but on the other her trauma has dragged my own back into the light. So my counseling is very intensive, too. It is very helpful though. I urge you to seek help - either privately or a support group near you. The great thing about support groups is that it lets you meet other people who have been through the exact same thing as you. The feeling of not being alone is wonderful.

I hope you find some help somewhere and some peace.

ow.im so sad to hear about that.before i used to object here in our country about teaching sex education while still in elementary years but now i came to a point that its better.im supporting about it. _______________ [url=http://www.ichatchildcare.com/]Free Child Care Tips & Guides, News and Updates[/url]