BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Permanent Birth Control: Questions

Hi everyone. It's been awhile since I've been on here, but I have many questions that I need help figuring out the answers to.

I've asked some of these before, but here's the situation. I am 20 and my fiance of four years is 25. We'll be married on March 31 of this year. We'd like to have a vasectomy done by our wedding date so we don't waste money on other forms of birth control. I have a few places I need to call that may do the surgery, but here are my questions...

Do you get everything settled over the phone before the surgery date or do you go in and meet with the doctor beforehand?

What are some responses you have used that have worked with doctors whom don't want to perform the surgeries on young (or child-free in general) men/women?

How long does the process usually take from first appointment until the last appointment (when you make sure there is no sperm left)?

Tim's reasoning to get the surgery is that he'd take his business elsewhere...but I thought that would make it too easy for the doctor to say, "Okay." Hopefully there won't be any problems, but I was thinking about asking how many abortions I'd need to have before the doctor would perform the surgery, if there were problems with the doctor's mentality. (Just for the record, I never want to get an abortion if I don't have to, but perhaps it would put a perspective on it?) I'm an extremely self-knowledgable and confident person, and I hope the doctor will see that and go along with the surgery without a fight. Any suggestions?

Hi there. My husband and I are going through this right now actually. Basically, he called a urologist to make an appointment. We went in together for a "consultation visit," which consisted of the doctor taking down basic medical info from hubby, explaining the procedure, the recovery, the fact that it should be considered permanent, the risks, etc. Then he asked if we still wanted to do it, we said "yep," and they called us on our cell within an hour to schedule the surgery (which is one month away). That's the soonest they could get us in. From the time of the surgery until sterility, our doctor said anywhere from eight to twelve weeks, minimum. Hubby will have to go back for sperm count checks after 6 weeks, then again at 12 weeks. They have to get TWO consecutives negatives. The doc said that we MUST use other forms of birth control until we get those two negatives, otherwise we still run the risk of getting pregnant (which the doc said happens alot). We got lucky, getting a doctor who didn't judge us or give us a hard time. I'd recommend that you both plan to do this journey together (go in together for all appointments, etc.), and communicate openly in front of the doctor...that way the doc knows you're both on board with this. (Our doc explained that they get hesitant to do the surgery based on people's ages, the certainty/hesitancy of having it done, and if they come in alone [then they're unsure if the spouse is okay with it].) Hope this helps!

Thanks for your response. Tim and I are hardly ever apart except for work so going together will not be a problem. We've known he would get a vasectomy around our wedding day since the first month that we'd known each other, and I think that certainty will definitely help us get our point across to whomever we come into contact with.

The getting-pregnant-after-vasectomy thing happened to my fiance's father and his wife, so I'm relieved to hear that they do two consecutive negatives. I had thought it was only one.

I think I might call the offices I have numbers for tomorrow and see how visits and the surgery schedule will work around our wedding and honeymoon and such. Thanks a lot for your response, once again, and I hope all goes well for you and him.

Good luck! I hope everything works out for you and they don't give you a hassle!

Good Luck - yes there does need to be two negative test results before you can be sure that you can stop birth control.