BellaOnline Forums Food and Wine Cooking For Kids What's Your Funny Cooking Story?

Huh, I received a copy of this same story about 2 years ago in an e-mail from a friend. It was one of those friend of a friend of a friend e-mails. Which I pretty much took to meant it was a joke and never really happened. Especially as the tag line read "Yes, she was blonde".

Back to the funny stories though...

This past week I've been pretty sick, so making a lot of soups and "comfort food" type stuff.

I decided to make Chicken and Dumplings one day - and I always put my chicken in the crockpot for a full day to get the best stock. At the same time our Thanksgiving turkey was not thawing fast enough so I did the water bath method to thaw it.

My 11 yr old daughter walked in and saw the turkey in the sink and goes "what's that?" I told her "that's the turkey",
she goes "For Thanksgiving?"
"Yes"
"but I thought you were already cooking it"
and I was completely lost, I didn't know what she was talking about. Then she goes -
"in the crockpot"
And I just cracked up. She thought our little 4 lb hen in the crockpot was the same thing as the 20 lb turkey! And she has grown up around caterers and chefs.

My funny cooking story...

The very first time I tried to make pancakes, I was just a kid and I'd had no experience cooking. I used a boxed mix.

The package instructions said to mix the ingredients...so that's what I did.

The package said to heat the frying pan...so that's what I did.

The package said to pour the batter into the pan...so that's what I did. All of it. At once.

As I stirred it around, waiting for it to form into pancakes, I eventually accepted that I'd produced breakfast food, all right. Tender and moist scrambled pancakes.

They didn't taste that bad, considering...



Karen
Nerd Writer Mom
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Well - my "child" had 4 legs. He was a Shetland Sheepdog.

My late husband was almost a full gourmet cook. I was not, although I loved to make stuff and it wasn't bad - I was just messy.

One day, after a few years, I happened to notice that when Bill was in the kitchen cooking - McTavish was never around his feet or anything. When I cooked - McTavish always came in the kitchen. I felt kinda proud.

Then I realized something - I dropped food and Bill didn't - no wonder the dog was in the kitchen.

Battle of the Mixer, Part One:

Today, I was getting ready to mix some ingredients for a recipe that I'm testing out for a future article (think Valentine's Cookies--yum)

I had laid out my ingredients and had my bowl and hand held mixer ready to go, lying beside the mixing bowl.

I plugged in the mixer, and then...

VRRZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!

Little did I know, the mixer was turned to "on" and it was spinning like crazy on my counter, lol! I must have jumped a foot in the air.

Once my heart rate returned to normal, I had two thoughts:

1. Always make sure your mixer is OFF before plugging it in.

2. If it's not, and you do what I just did, come on over to this thread and tell us about it, lol!

Battle with the Mixer, Part Two:

Well, you can read my post above to see how this battle with my mixer started, lol!

Today, I was mixing another round of dough. Somehow, the fork in my left hand became intertwined with the mixer in my right hand, while it was blending the ingredients.

It made such a loud noise that my dog ran to the other side of the house! In about two seconds, dough went all over the kitchen�on my counter, my cabinet, and myself.

After I unplugged the mixer, all I could do was just laugh!

The good news? I still had plenty of dough to complete my Valentine�s Day recipe, which will appear on the Cooking for Kids site shortly�right after I mix the ingredients for the icing.

Well, by hand, that is, since my mixer seems to have won this battle.

To be continued�

I was 23 years old (now 50) back one week from my honeymoon and had friends over for dinner.

I had never made a pie, and was trilled when I took my apple pie out of the oven and it looked so beautiful. I took it into the livingroom to show everyone and tilted it only slightly to show them the beautiful top and the entire inside of the pie slide out and fell onto the carpet.

I was speachless and then completely doubled over in laughter!

Took years to live it down.

Three Spices, that is such a funny story! Thank you for sharing!

The other night, I had several peeled hard boiled eggs on my plate, and as I sat down to eat, two of them flew off the plate, kinda like your pie! My dog moved faster than I even knew he could move, and in two seconds they were gone, lol.

Thank you again for sharing!

Oh, where to begin! When I was a young child, I wanted to cook candied apples so much. I talked my mother into letting me do it but she did not supervise due to her depression.

Anyway, I stirred the pot with one hand while I read the recipe that was in my other hand. My stirring hand was getting warmer and when I looked up, I noticed that my hand was lowering into the pot. I raised my hand only to see the spoon was half gone! Turned out that the plastic mixing spoon I was using was melting into the boiling sugar syrup mixture! I was too young to realize that candy syrup got that hot! Of course I had to throw away the entire batch and start over.

Another story, again when I was young (about 10-12 or so), I painstakingly peeled apples to make apple butter. I read about it in a storybook and it sounded so homey! The mixture simmered and turned brown from the cinnamon spices. It smelled divine. But I'd never seen apple butter and assumed that it was the color of peeled apples and butter. My heart fell as I thought I'd burned it. I poured a wonderful batch of apple butter down the drain! One day, I saw apple butter and conked my head.

And yet another: My first attempt at biscuits when I was 8 resulted in some tough discs. I was proud but then my mother coaxed my little sister into eating one and her loose tooth fell out. I never lived that one down.

And from my adult years: Growing up in a Japanese household, I always cooked the rice. But living in a contemporary world with electricity, we always used an electric rice cooker. Well, one day at a friend's party, I was asked to cook some rice to go with dinner. There wasn't an electric cooker and I didn't know how to use the stovetop to make rice but I proceeded using the long grain variety that was available but very different from the Japanese short grain. The result was sticky, soupy rice. Everyone thought it was hilarious that I couldn't cook rice. Today that would sound so racist! Anyway, to make it worse, there was a Minute Rice commercial going around that talked about how everything at the meal was perfect...except the rice.

This isn't a cooking story but close: My little nephew and my little boy were playing at the table, shooting peas across the table at each other and, after several reprimands, they continued. I got annoyed and told them to STOP as I shoveled a forkful of fish into my mouth. They stopped and stared at me wide-eyed and then kept eating silently, just watching me chew. I thought to myself, "Wow, that never worked so well before." Turned out that it wasn't my "STOP" that made them stop but the fact that they were shooting a fish's eyeball back and forth and it landed right onto my fork which I had stuffed into my mouth. They were aghast that I was chewing a fish eye. I don't like fish eyes. When they finally told me, we all couldn't resist laughing until we cried.

Finally: This is from a Zen master who told the story of how he found his cat curled up, warming himself, on a stack of his freshly made pancakes on the table. I can't recall the Zen lesson here because the image of the cat on the pancakes was too funny.

Sorry, I know I tend to be long winded here.

But I have a ton of examples of cooking mishaps because I'm such ditz. Here's one more:

After simmering a beautiful stock all day long, I drained the bones, vegetables and herbs into a colandar. Only, I forgot to put a pot to catch the broth underneath so I drained my savory stock down the drain while keeping the spent bones and veggies.

*sigh*

Hi Lori! Your stories were so funny! Thank you so much for sharing, and don't ever worry about being long winded here!

I am just so relieved that everyone has shared their funny cooking stories. When I first started this thread, I was REALLY worried I'd be the only one with stories to add to it, lol!

Your story about the plastic spoon made me think about my pink, "Easy Bake" oven I had as a child. I can't remember exactly what happened, but I think my friend and I left one of the utensils inside the oven, resulting in a severely melted utensil and broke oven. And, the smell of burnt plastic lingered for days.

Thanks again for sharing your stories!

Come on back if you have any other stories to share (the fish eyeball one still has me laughing so hard)

I'm sure I'll have a few more of my own to add anytime now!