BellaOnline Forums News and Politics Pro-Life Question Regarding the "exceptions"

I am pro-choice (not free-for-all pro-choice....pretty strict personal guidelines). I think Rebecca is right, I don't see us all agreeing over tea anytime soon, but we are not enemies.

I am curious, since my daughter and I discussed it recently (due to Sarah Palin, again with whom I disagree on the issue but for whom I have the utmost respect give the courage she has in her conviction) how the "with the exception of rape and incest" pro-life position works. The manner of conception of a child, it seems to me, should bear no consequence of a true pro-life position. An innocent is an innocent, true? Life is life. So my daughter asked me (and frankly I am also very curious) how the "except for rape and incest" pro-life advocates rectify the exception with their belief. That has been one of my biggest complaints about the pro-life position, and frankly that Palin had the guts to say publically there are no exceptions impressed me like I have not been impressed politically in a long, long time. Girl's got moxie! You guys have a great week!

This is an area that I really struggle with.

I do not think abortion is good under any circumstances, but there are some instances where the decision is so painful that it is hard to say that someone is wrong.

I was a rape (date-rape) victim myself in college. Luckily I did not become pregnant. I would like to think that I would not have had an abortion if I had become pregnant, but I honestly do not know what I would have done at the time. I was only 18, this was how I lost my virginity, and I didn't even tell my family about it until about 5 years ago. A pregnancy at the time very well could have made me extremely panicked.

To me I have always thought rape is worse than murder. A murder victim does not continue to suffer. A rape victim suffers for the rest of their life, at least a little bit. Nightmares, post traumatic stress disorder, poor self image, eating disorders, depression, alcoholism and drug abuse - all these are lingering effects of a rape.

Add to that having to carry the child of the man that brutalized you, for almost a year - that is very hard to imagine. I realize it is not the child's fault, that this is an innocent soul - but it is still a daily reminder of what happened. I can't judge someone that is not able to take that.

Incest just doubles the trauma. Add in the fact of having to explain to the child one day that his dad is also his grandpa, and we are talking about a traumitized child as well as mother. Also there is the risk of genetic defects in this instance.

I guess what it comes down to is: in a perfect world there would be no abortion, but in a perfect world there would also be no rape or incest.

These are not easy decisions to be made, and unless we are the ones making that decision then we really don't have the right to judge. Either choice has repurcussions. The mother is already a victim of a crime. It is not fair to make her into a bad person because of a horrible choice that is forced on her without her permission to begin with.

I honestly feel like those pro-lifers who make the exception cases are just doing so because society makes them out to be total monsters if they don't make AT LEAST that exception.

Think about it, the first thing a pro-lifer is asked is "what about rape or incest?" No one wants to see someone else victimized or traumatized more than necessary, and imo it's easy to see why someone might be more willing to cave in that case because it's not like the woman (or child) is having the abortion as a form of birth control because she was too lazy to use birth control in the first place. It's not like she had a choice in having the sex that caused the pregnancy either.

We discussed abortion in my women's studies class the other day and it was not surprising to hear from young students how many of their friends had had MULTIPLE abortions. Rather than be responsible and take control of their bodies and get birth control or practice somewhat safe sex, they were using abortion as their birth control. I think that is messed up. Regardless of whether I agree with abortion or not, I think using, or rather, ABUSING it in that way is wrong. I mean, one time you might be able to convince me something went wrong etc. but come on, 2, 3, 4, 5+ abortions? To me that is just ridiculous, not to mention not good for the female body.

I've always considered myself to be pro-life ....

I think using abortion as a form of birth control is irresponsible and dangerous and just plain lazy.

I don't think abortion should be illegal because I do think women should have the right to choose what is best for them, even if I personally disagree.

Ultimately it's a morality issue and I believe we each will have to answer for our actions one day. That's MY belief. If we made abortions illegal, there would still be those who found a way to have them and in even less safe conditions. I don't want to see that happen. When it comes to abortion in the case of incest, rape or when the life of the mother is threatened, well, I think those are such extreme cases I cannot really answer how I feel on those because I have not been in those positions.

I think as far as legalized abortion goes, those should be the only reasons (rape, incest, life of mother threatened) why one should be even thinking about having an abortion. Having an abortion because one is simply not ready to be a parent makes me question why they weren't more responsible when they were having sex so they wouldn't be in that position in the first place. Or why they didn't get the morning after pill (which is still questionable technically).

I also happen to disagree with young girls being able to get abortions without any sort of parental consent. At that young of an age, kids assume they know how their parents will react and in some cases they may be right, but not in every case. They are emotional, they have no idea what to do and I think places are more than happy to take their money and perform the abortion without any regard to the emotional and phyical affects it might have on that young girl. And then when her own parents don't know, she really has no emotional support to back her up and help her through it. Just doesn't seem like a healthy or proactive way to go about doing things. I understand there may be some extreme cases where this MIGHT be the best situation, but I don't believe that to be the case for the majority.

Chelle, I am sorry to hear about what happened to you those years ago. I, like you, am a victim. And like you, I was lucky enough not to get pregnant. I think that if I had become pregnant I probably would have gotten an abortion.

I admit I haven't had much time to research the processes of how these 'exceptions' would work, but I am curious. How would one decide that these women truly 'qualify' for these exceptions? In cases of danger to the mother's life may be more obvious.

In cases of rape, incest or otherwise, I think that sounds more complicated. How would they know if it were really rape or someone trying to just take advantage of the exception? If a woman were raped, what kind of process would she have to endure, after the experience of being raped, to prove that she was raped and be able to get an abortion? Would she have to go to the hospital and get examined? If so, if she didn't have health insurance, would she have to pay for that? (I don't know how that works as of right now) Would she be required to file a police report or have law enforcement involved in any way? How many people would she have to tell and be questioned by before she was approved for the abortion? Who are the people that would 'aprove' these abortion exceptions?

Questions like these make me wonder.

I truely admire those woman who are strong enough to go through the legal process, whatever the outcome of their case. As we know, there are many many more woman who do not come forward about their experience. I did not come forward with mine. I was too ashamed and scared to tell anyone about it till years later.

If I had gotten pregnant, it would be nice to know that if I chose to have an abortion, I could do it without having to add all kinds of other things on top of being raped and then getting an abortion.

But again, I have no idea about any of these processes for the exceptions.

I don't think that abortion should become illegal. As others have said, someone would find a way to do it anyway. And chances are it would be unsafe.

I think education is key in prevention of pregnancy in the first place, from both parents and schools. Though, I do not have children, so I cannot say too much about that subject.