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Joined: Mar 2005
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It's a shame that more people aren't willing to engage in open conversation about such a hot-button issue. I did notice that the pro-choice forum users seem to get very perturbed when pro-lifers join in their forum's dialogue, but they have no trouble jumping in here...

I'm simply concerned about the double standard. I welcome the pro-choicers to come here and engage in civil discussions. What isn't welcome here - or any other board at Bella, for that matter - is flaming, abusive language, threats, etc. If you can get your point across without haranguing others, be my guest and jump in... One word of caution, though, I noticed some heated threads that had devolved into name-calling; that's ridiculous and won't be tolerated here.

As for pro-lifers that have deliberately tried to incite arguments at the pro-choice forum (only 1 or 2 users), please refrain from being inflammatory in the future. The friendly debates and learning conversations are a great thing, though, so just remember to be respectful...

Bottom line: more people than you realize are reading your words right now, and some are forming lasting, critical opinions and convictions. Be very careful before you hit "submit;" that's for both sides of the debate.


Rebecca Orczeck
prolife@bellaonline.com

"My purpose in this forum is to protect the rights of the unborn and their mothers, and to educate the public on the dangers of abortion."
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Gecko
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Hi Rebecca,

I'm of the Pro-Choice variety myself, but having been in a few discussions lately and then having seen this post pop up on the right-side column, I wanted to see what your post was about.

Thank you for welcoming me, even though my particular belief, with regard to the title of the room I'm currently in, differs from others.

I used to be on the Pro-Life side of the fence, mostly from the age of reason until I was about 28. I was Catholic until about 2 years ago, and I'm now 36. So being Catholic and being Pro-Life was a bit of a dichotomy, since advocating life under all circumstances is one of their tenets.

The children I taught in CCD (the Catholic term for children's Sunday school) never knew I was Pro-Choice, and I even lied when they asked me about it, always upholding the Church doctrine for them.

Whoops...just got company. I'll finish this post when I can, later tonight hopefully.

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Gecko
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(continued from last post)

Anyway, so even though I'm Pro-Choice now, I know the main reasons why many people choose to advocate the Pro-Life stance after being there myself.

If I ever post in here, I will be respectful of everyone's views, as I consider myself a guest, and I would think the gist of any of my posts in here would be to simply say, "I see your point."

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Gecko
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Welcome, and yes I am Pro-Choice. Just to be fair you have to admit that alot of the "discussions" do get heated after very disrespectful words and very derogatory accusations are used. I honestly don't think the Pro-Choice board does not welcome Pro-Life visitors as long as the same respect is given. Sorry not trying to be difficult but trying to point out that respect works both ways.

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Thank you both for replying. I'm glad to know that there are people here on BellaOnline boards willing to be civil and thoughtful if any debates/discussions are brought up.

I understand what you're saying, CrochetQueen. After reading several threads, I think there are both pro-choice and pro-life readers who would rather close their eyes and see the people on the other side of the debate go away. That's not very fair or open-minded, and it's not my personal stance on dealing with people w/conflicting opinions- here on the boards or in my personal/professional life.

Luckily, I do believe the majority of readers here are intelligent and are truly seeking education, not a fight. That's why I originally posted the "Welcome, civil people" sentiments with a few ground rules for those who are bent on causing problems.

Realistically, I doubt we're all going to sit down for tea anytime soon and come around to a universal verdict on the abortion matter. That said, we are certainly not enemies and this isn't a war zone...

Climbing down from the soapbox now....


Rebecca Orczeck
prolife@bellaonline.com

"My purpose in this forum is to protect the rights of the unborn and their mothers, and to educate the public on the dangers of abortion."
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Jellyfish
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It would be nice to have intelligent conversations without the sweeping remarks such as, "All pro-lifers hate women."



Paula Laurita
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It would be nice to have an intelligent conversation, period. Sweeping statements that I cannot debate about (see "Questions about pro-choice) because in their eyes I am and always will be wrong, chap my hide. Why bother to ask when you're not open to debate?

In the end, this topic comes down to belief. As far as I can tell, people who are pro-life believe that a fertilized egg/embryo/fetus in any stage of development is a human being and has a right to be protected even to the detriment of the economical/emotional/medical health of the woman bearing it. I do not.

You have your beliefs, I have mine; I don't call you names, please do not try to shame me, call me names, inflict your philosophy/morality/religion on me.

May I start a topic in your forum if I promise to behave?

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It depends on the reason for your need to have the conversation. NO one used to believe that it was okay to arbitrarily end a pregnancy simply for convenience sake. There was a time where we as a society would not have considered that any more than beating someone to death.
All those that belief life is sacred from conception to grave aren't intellectual nicompoops. If life isnt sacred in general, and we don't draw lines in the sand, then life isn't valuable at all.
Why does society keep changing the parameters of what is sacred, valuable, right or wrong? What kind of outcome are we looking for from this sliding scale?
That might be a discussion worth having, but trying to make people feel foolish for caring that much isn't.



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Jellyfish
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calligrapher, I did not call anyone an intellectual nincompoop. You (general you) have your beliefs, I have mine. I just find it very frustrating to be considered this immoral/evil/horrible person just because I have different beliefs. And if you do not think that of me, I apologize, but that is certainly the vibe I get from most all people who are pro-life. Certain members of my family are vehemently pro-life. So I keep my mouth shut around my family and fume as they tsk tsk about those morally bankrupt women who kill babies or want to keep it legal.

I do have a what-if situation I would like your (again, general you) opinion on. It is not one I have ever been in, but it is one I easily could have been in when I was younger.

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Before this conversation degenerates into a real furnace...

Let me remind everyone that just because someone hits "reply" does not necessarily mean they are replying to your statement. It is just the easiest way to join a conversation.

This is one of those issues thast everyone takes personally, so don't read extra into posts that a person is necessarily attacking YOU.


Michelle Taylor
Marriage Editor
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