BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids "We are trying!"

Let me put a different perspective on this one. I dealt with infertility, and dh was very private about it. I felt, though, that it was a medical concern, and can be very overwhelming for the couple. If I had diabetes, it wouldn't have had to be so hush-hush, so why should a different medical concern be stigmatized like that?

"Trying" can often include some very clinical aspects, like monitoring basal temperatures to know when/if ovulation is occurring, blood tests, injections, ultrasounds... it can be a very dominating feature of your life.

Now, if they just decided to try for a baby, and aren't dealing with infertility that may be a different issue.

Just a different side of the picture.

Still, I don't need to know about it. I don't need to know when bodily functions are part of someone's disease, either.

Going to the gynie is something that every woman does, but I don't feel the need to announce it to the world. In fact, I'd prefer that people don't even consider the fact that I go there.

And it's not like having a child is a life or death situation. Except for nosy busy-bodies, I'm guessing that the majority of people don't really care if you're "trying" or not, no matter the circumstance.

What Ingilbert said. Every. Single. Word.

Frankly, I wouldn't feel the need to discuss my diabetes with anyone but my doctor, either. There is a difference between "stigmatized" and "private." Just because I don't want to hear about irritable bowel syndrome, erectile dysfunction or other medical conditions doesn't mean I'm "stigmatizing" their victims; I simply don't want to hear about it unless you're a friend in need of help or comfort.


So can living with herpes. Still don't need to know about it.

>I just have to point this out but how much sex are you actually having if you know the exact date of conception?

It's irrelevant if you are tracking ovulation. If you know when you ovulated, you know when conception occurred. Before and after -- just for fun, ya know. (And when it isn't "you have to" time, it is more fun.)

^^^ that may be true but I still don't wanna know the date

urk...are people videotaping the conception nowadays for Youtube as well as the birth?

God, nothing would surprise me. I just want to know when it was everyone thought it was a good idea to "let it all hang out". I must have missed the memo.

My private life is private. Don't ask, don't tell. There are still some things that totally DON'T need to be shared.

As for people saying "we're trying" I'd be all "trying what? Ethnic food? Skydiving? What?" I'm very good at disingenious or even downright vacuous, when the mood suits me...

No, the videotaping of the conception is on Xtube

Telling people the due date is perfectly fine, but I've never had anyone tell me the date of conception. Ewww. You really don't need to tell me what day you were having sex. Come on, people. Have we no common decency?