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#388670 03/07/08 10:02 AM
Joined: Dec 2007
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Gecko
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Gecko
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 557
Here's a post that was put on truedadconfessions:

My beloved wife,
I love you more than either of us could ever imagine! Before we were married I told you that I did not want to have children. You said that you were okay with this and married me anyway. Now that we are married it appears that you have changed your mind and now desire a child. Unfortunately, I have not changed my mind. Nagging me everyday to have a child will not get me change my mind, so please stop! If you truly feel that you must have a child then you have married the wrong person. I will understand if my choice to remain childless is a deal breaker for you and you decide to release our relationship. I would like nothing less for both you and I then our highest and greatest good and happiness. Right now we are both unhappy since the life experience we each desire is mutually exclusive from one another. Please make up your mind soon.

Your loving husband

I feel so bad for him. What a betrayal, when someone changes and wants something from you that you absolutely cannot give.


...the cake is a lie...the cake is a lie...the cake is a lie...
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Parakeet
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Parakeet
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I hope he is being diligent about B.C. on his end, if his wife wants a child that badly.

Cindy

Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 332
K
Shark
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Shark
K
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frown That is so sad! I hate hearing stories like this where the cf person has to give in to save the relationship. Don't people realize what it means to bring another human being into the world?!! There are too many people in the world as it is, there's no need to create more, especially when they aren't 100% wanted.

Here's a prediction for this sad story: the guy will have to leave his wife, and she'll have a baby with the next guy who comes along and then that relationship probably won't last either, so now there will be two divorces/splits AND a fatherless child. ugh!


the only thing i want to parent is my great dane!
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 793
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Gecko
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Gecko
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"But I thought he'd change his mind!!!"

Switch the uterus off.
Listen to what I tell you.
Take it on board.
Know that I mean it.
Why is that so hard for you??

Poor guy.


Childfree? Join us at www.thechildfreelife.com.
Pikasam #388735 03/07/08 12:01 PM
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Parakeet
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Parakeet
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WHY can't people appreciate what they have, rather than pine for what they don't have, especially when that thing they don't have is such a gamble, and no guarantee of happiness?

Cindy

Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 112
Jellyfish
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Jellyfish
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Posts: 112
Wow...how sad!
I don't think that, if this is a dealbreaker for her, it will be easy to find such a loving husband again.

I know a woman that broke off her relationship because she desperately wanted a child.
Now she has a baby girl with a guy she knows for 1.5 years!!!

I'm not surprised at (can I say that...?) the rate of divorces in austria....


"Every man is the architect of his own fortune."
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Amoeba
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Amoeba
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Originally Posted By: Cookiecody
WHY can't people appreciate what they have, rather than pine for what they don't have, especially when that thing they don't have is such a gamble, and no guarantee of happiness?

Cindy


I ask this question about my sister all the time. She's always planning the next big thing. Now, happily married, 2 babies, just moved into a great house, and she's worried that they need to move into a good school district so she's planning on the house they are going to buy in 3 years before the oldest is in kindergarden. Some people are just not content, no matter what.

pinkbows #388923 03/07/08 04:26 PM
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Parakeet
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Parakeet
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I do appreciate what I have. I have a good house in a good neighborhood for two people, I have a good car, DW works at home at a job she loves, I work in a job that I love and get paid good money at, and I'm content.

One thing that always gets me is the need to buy a house in a "good" school neighborhood. I don't have to worry about that. The interesting thing is that in a development of 800 homes, our subdivision is one of 30 homes, our house is the second one in, has the second largest yard of any house around, but is the smallest house of all. It would be sufficient for 3 kids (two in a big bedroom and one in a smaller bedroom) but we have reallocated that space so that DW has an upstairs office, and I have my own bedroom/hangout space smile Couldn't do that with kids around, or we'd need... drum roll...yet ANOTHER bigger house. With the price of housing now, that would be astronomical (and that isn't with the cost of kids themselves!)

Yep, we're staying there. smile


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Posts: 73
Amoeba
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Amoeba
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My sister is nuts- but just to clarify- there is really only one public elementary school that is integrated, in the whole city. If you don't live in that district, the kid MUST go to private school, unless the parents are drug addicts on welfare and the poor kid has no other choice.

I guess my point is tho, that she's worried about something that's not going to be an issue for THREE YEARS. I mean enjoy your life in the present!

Last edited by pinkbows; 03/07/08 04:35 PM.
pinkbows #388937 03/07/08 04:43 PM
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Parakeet
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Parakeet
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She might need 3 years to save up for the DP on a house in that district. In that case she might not be that crazy. Or it might take her 3 years to sell the house she is in NOW.

In any case, not a mindset I would want to be in...



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