BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids "The best decision I ever made."

I hear that a lot from parents. I'm glad they feel that way, as it would be tragic if they felt the opposite.

Personally, I feel the best decision I ever made was learning to play bass. I had some pretty inappropriate impulses when I was younger, but the desire to succeed as a bassist kept me from doing anything too stupid. It also helped me to develop and maintain a sense of purpose and self-worth when other parts of my life weren't going so well. I have met (and continue to meet) many exceptional people through my musical endeavors, my dh included. It remains fun for me and pays some of the bills. I can't imagine what my life would be like if I hadn't made this choice.

So -- what's the 'best decision' you've ever made?

wow, that's a tough question. a few top decisions come to mind:
1. getting back together with my then boyfriend, now amazing husband (having faith that we could get through anything)
2. moving to portland
3. getting my MSW

I've made a few decisions, large and small, that I'm proud of (and may more that I'm not), but #1 has to be taking the time to get to know the guy everyone told me was "trouble" or "a waste of time." We've been together for five and a half happy years.

I guess the best decision I ever made was to NOT be a parent.

What a great thread. Parents have to say that and it bugs me when they say it in a way that insinuates I have missed out. Here are three of the best decisions I ever made.

1. Going to London a year after my husband left me - being brave enough to leave my job and my home. It brought me so many opportunities, enabled me to buy a house, and opened my eyes to a bigger world. I aso now have an international reputation in my field because of the work I did in the UK.

2. After much soul searching, deciding not to become a single mother when I was in my late 30s and seriously considered the option. One of the best decisions I ever made. I just shudder now to think of it.

3. Marrying my husband. He has brought me stability, love and kindness.

let's see here are mine!

1.) Going to Germany in the summer of 96' to see if there was a future with the guy i had been seeing a few yrs. before that in college(he was on a 1 yr. exchange program) turns out there was and he is now my darling DH married now for over 9 1/2 yrs.!

2.) sticking up for myself to my parent when my DH and i were looking to buy a house 7yrs. ago. they kept trying to pressure us to buy a house in the burbs(nothing wrong with the burbs but it just wasn't where we wanted to live) and we actually got into a huge fight about it and didnt' speak for three weeks. finally i told them that it's our life and that we live buy a house where we want and they just have to accept it. we wound up buying an awesome house in the city and we love it!

3.) deciding to be firmly CF. i went through a few yrs. of trying to come to terms with the reality of not wanting children and now i'm very comfortable with it

indigo

Here is my list of wise decisions
1) Choosing an active, healthy and athletic lifestyle in my late teens. At times during my high school years, I hung out with the wrong crowd and was more lucky than smart on a few occasions.
2) Getting snipped. I have read enough stories from other members of this board about "oops" pregnancies to know the $160 for the snip was very well spent. Peace of mind for the rest of my life is priceless!
3) Buying a home in 1994. I haven't done well WRT to raises in the time since, but having a cheap mortgage helps offset that.
4) Choosing a different career path in my early 20s. I hated electrical engineering and went into surveying. I am probably dead last in terms of salary compared to my electronics classmates from the late 1980s or early 1990s and I don't care. I am pretty confident that I have had more fun and less stress than them.

1. Changing my mind and going out on a second date with the man who is now my husband. I wasn't going to go, actually turned him down, then called him back because I came to me senses. 5 years later and over 3 years of marriage and we are still happy as can be!

2. Gettin my Masters Degree. It has opened many doors for me!

3. Recently quitting my job of over 3 years. It is time to me to move out of my comfort zone and take on something new and I am ready to start my new job in 2 weeks!

In no particular order, I would have to say the following:

- Getting up the nerve to talk to my husband. He was too shy and I had to take the first step in getting us together.

- Getting my master's degree. I may not be really using it, but the extra study and being a TA gave me much more confidence in what I do. Also, one of the hardest things I ever did was take the comps, and I am tremendously proud of that (and the half-dozen or so scholarly papers I wrote in grad school.)

- Deciding to go to a therapist. I suffered from horrible anxiety for five years. I couldn't eat in public, I couldn't eat for days before a stressful thing (like a job interview, a speech, seeing my boyfriend ...) I got all better. It was also one of the hardest things I ever did, get better from anxiety.

- Convincing my mom to let me rent the house while I finished school, since she had moved out and it was paid off. Now we own it, and if I hadn't convinced her to keep the house, we wouldn't be able to afford a house where we are.

What a fascinating thread!

Great start bssgirl. I am so envious of people who stuck with their instruments enough to learn them and have fun playing. I always resisted practicing, and eventually gave up, and now wish I had been more disciplined. I hope to get back to music somehow though. It seems like a great way to spend time, connects you with people, and is fun at any age.

Here are mine:

��making it through college all at once. Around junior year I wanted to drop out and work more. SO glad I didn't and got my degree behind me early

� Postponing grad school and learning to surf. From some perspectives this may not have been the best decision, but in many ways it was beneficial. Met my husband, made lots of friends, stayed in shape, had great fun, forced me to find a career where I could live near the ocean and have a flexible job.

� Marrying my husband with little forethought, when he was diagnosed with cancer. Saved him, his house, and it's worked out long term. : )

��Quitting my graphic arts job and going freelance. It's been much more enriching, creative and challenging than my previous job. Income doubled from the start, enabling us to refinance our house and buy our ranch.

��Buying land in a location of our wildest fantasies.

��Selling our 1st house at the peak of the market, barely avoiding joint nervous breakdowns

Having a child would have made much of that impossible.