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divorce and sibling relationships #369015 01/23/08 10:07 PM
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 105
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Keaghry Offline OP
Jellyfish
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Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 105
I'm just curious about other people's experiences with their siblings.

I am the youngest, at 38, of three sisters, and the only one not married, my sisters are nine and eleven years older then me, and our relationship has been cordial, but not close.

This summer, the middle sister was informed by her husband that he wanted a divorce after nearly twenty five years of marriage, and she promptly went off the deep end.

We usually have a family get together in October, and had one last year, and her puppy crapped on the carpet at my other sister's house. When I went to get what my brother in law used to clean poop off the carpet, she told me to ask first, well, I'm not dumb, so I walked away (with the cleaner) and said "Yes, Mother", because my sisters have always treated me like I'm a halfwit, and I'm not.

To make a long story short, I stood my ground, which I've rarely done and for that, both sisters roundly decided I'm [censored] and unless they can control me, have no value. We are talking on a very limited basis now and that's fine by me, because I never needed them the way they thought I should, I wanted sisters, not keepers or two more moms, my mom did just fine by me.

i've pretty much accepted that their attitude doesn't make sense and never will, but I was very angry for a time at their disrespect to me, to my mother and father, and to the guy I am close to. Don't ever be thinking I need or want your approval for anything, least of all for him.

Have other people had similar situations? I'd like to hear if you have : )

Re: divorce and sibling relationships [Re: Keaghry] #369017 01/23/08 10:25 PM
Joined: Jan 2008
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mommyword Offline
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I am the youngest of 4, though the eldest was not in my life until I was in my 20's as she had been given up for adoption.

My mother is divorced from my father, however she re-married when I was 13ish. (She had dated him for years though)

My 2 sisters and I are not close, we have nothing in common, we can't even have 5 words worth of civil conversation due to the things they have done to our mother. They are both addicts and former prostitutes who could not raise their own children or provide the basic necessities in life, wherein I had to help raise one while I was still in high school

While I do not have a relationship with the mothers above I do with their children, and their children and I get along so long as we dont talk about their mothers. Of the 6 kids from the 2 above 3 are over 18 already.

The sister given up for adoption - she and I get along, we chat we email, we share photos, our kids spend time together and we have as close a relationship as we can considering she is a 1000 miles away.

I was always the "mom" one when it came to my sisters as I was the one who did not run away or do drugs and was there for my mom and stepdad when the others did.

So there's my story - I'm 37 I have 2 kids of my own, both from failed marriages, and am comfortable breaking in husband #3 after 8 years together!


Pat - Mommyword

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~ may the road rise to meet you
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