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My boyfriend has been living with me for one year now. When we first started the drinking was just on weekends we would party hard and go to clubs, I was a liquor promoter so I would have to work the first half of the night at the club while my Boyfriend was already drinking. It was like that for a while, until it became an everyday thing. I was drinking with him a lot as well. Until I started to see my face looking tired and I wasn�t feeling the same and missing work a lot I knew I had to stop this. It wasn�t one glass or 2 it was getting drunk. Then I stopped drinking so much just some wine.
I kept telling my boyfriend we need to stop this drinking because it�s not going to get us anywhere. The problem is my Boyfriend always does this, now it�s even worse. It�s come to the point that he started throwing up blood. Having a hangover, thinking that his hangover will go away with a beer again the next day and he didn�t eat. He�s a small guy with very little weight on him. I stared to get scared and told him no more drinking during the wk. He said ok but didn�t stop again! Now I am at the point that my Boyfriend can�t find a steady job I pay for every thing that we need in the house. I am getting very frustrated . I love him and I would love to have everything that we talked about family a house moving out of the sate or even country. But now I am starting to think all that was the alcohol talking. I don�t know what to do. I keep telling him to drink he hasn�t stopped this morning he woke up throwing up again.

Ladystar, he needs to get to a doctor, pronto! There is a reason for his throwing up blood and it can't be good! I don't know how to tell you this without sounding "preachy", so I'll just say it. Get out. And don't look back. I wasted 15 years of my life with an alcoholic. I kept thinking things would get better. He would quit. He had a couple of medical problems that the doctor warned him about and told him he needed to quit drinking. He wouldn't do it. It truly is a disease. If you won't leave, at least get yourself to an Al-Anon meeting so maybe you can learn how to cope. My spouses life ended tragically. And mine almost did. He attempted to murder me and then turned the gun on himself. We were separated at the time, and were one week away from going in front of a judge to get a divorce decree. I came about as close to death as one can come; yet somehow I managed to survive. I spent 3 months in the hospital and another 6 weeks att home. I then returned to work under limited duty. I had a colostomy (which I had reversed 6 months later) and returned to work full time 6 weeks after that surgery. Needless to say, I am still struggling with the psycological scars (15 years later). Two years after all this, I married again; and to another alcoholic. This time it only took me 4 years to smarten up. I've been happily single now for almost 8 years. I'm in a good relationship with a guy that drinks probably one beer a week. My life is good.
Don't let your love for this man blind you to the reality of your situation. He has a serious problem and will only drag you right down with him. Please listen to my advice and at least think about what I am saying. I know what I am telling you is a very difficult thing. And if this is your home, you might be looking at having to make him leave. No doubt you are facing some of the toughest decisions you've ever had to make in your life. I know exactly what it feels like. Is there a women's crisis center in your area? You might try and find a support group there. I did that when I left my spouse. I walked away from our home, our pets; everything. I knew I had to if I was going to keep my sanity.
Sorry if this was a bit long; as you can tell, your message struck a nerve when I read it. God bless you and may He give you the strength you need to deal with this.

My step father was recently diagnosed with liver sorosis (that isn't how you spell it but that is how it sounds). It is from many many years of drinking everyday,literarly every day just like your boyfriend. He was throwing up blood, had blood in is bowel movements. He has caught it early enough that the damage is repairable without a transplant but now he has opened his self up to getting hepatitis, cancer, etc. He also discovered that since he damaged his own liver from drinking, if it comes to him needed a transplant, he isn't on the high priority list. Just a heads up.....

yeah Jeanette is so right ..Alcoholic Liver cirrhosis has started, n he needs immediate care as he must be getting anaemic due to losing so much blood, and he may aspirate blood into lungs(and cause suffocation)anyday by drinking so much and thus it can become an emergency any day.....so medically I had advise go consult a doctor and further when he is treated focus on de addiction. Take care!!!

Ah imgood brings up a good point! What if he gets drunk, passes out, and the blood comes up and he inhales it. Good way to set up an infection of the lungs as well.

OMG this is crazy. He has throw up blood he says only spots of blood very very little. It�s funny because my brother�s girl friend is a nurse at a rehab center I told her if she can talk to him. She told him that Aleve can really mess him up after drinking (for head aches) and he actually listen to her. I also told him that he needs to take a liver test. So he can see how bad he is. I use to drink big time as well, but after seeing the way he is and gets it freaked me out and stopped doing it so much he is not violent in anyway to me he�s just simply lazy. I asked him today to please not drink at least till Friday to give him self a break. This is something that just hit me and I am starting to realize I didn�t think of this that serious until recently. Thank you every one for your response I will seriously stop drinking myself. I do love him and I am going to try to help him. But I do understand that I can only do so much.

Hello. Ummmm, it's not normal to throw up "little spots of blood." Tell him either he gets help or you are walking out. I had a liver transplant. It was not due to drinking. Here is a link that talks about esophagel varices which are bleeding veins in the esophagus, caused by damage to the liver. You say that you love him and want to help him. You admitted that he is lazy and cant hold a job. You said your are the only one paying for household stuff. So what is he doing while you are out there working to pay the bills? Drinking? Throwing up? Sleeping off his last night's drunk? Is this what you really want for your life? Is this who you want to have kids with? Are you crazy? Listen to these other women. You can't help him unless he wants help. If you someday want kids, a house it's not gonna happen unless he wants help. You will be babysitting this man for the rest of your life. Sounds like he needs AA.BellaOnline ALERT: Raw URLs are not allowed in these forums for security reasons. Please use UBB code. If you don't know how to do UBB code just post here for help - we will help out!

I am sorry to come off sounding so harsh. I have never been in a relationship with an alchoholic, other than a dating one back when I was 19 and to young to really understand. He was throwing up daily with blood in his vomit. One of the posters tells how many years she "wasted" staying in an alcoholic relationship. I was in a marriage for 4 yrs with someone who was emotionally abusive. It finally came to a point where I asked myself "is this normal?" I called a councelor and was told that if I am having to ask myself if my relationship is normal, than it probably isnt. I feel that I wasted 4 yrs with this person. You have given this man a year of your time. I ask you, what have you gotten in return? I understand about loving a person and sticking with them. That is why I stayed as long as I did. You sound as if you are already becoming resentful that you are the one holding the fort down. It will only get worse. He will begin to sense your frustration and say anything to smooth things over. He already has. He said he would stop but he didnt. He isnt being fair to you. Stick to your guns...dont waste time.You asked him to hold off drinking until Friday. If he cant then he has a problem or he doesnt care about your feelings. You have posted here so have admitted to yourself that a problem exists...that is a wonderful 1st step. It is very difficult to leave an abuser. Get good and angry...think about what this man has cost you. Think about the life you wanted with him in the begining. Are things going the way that you had hoped for? Think about what it is you want out of life. I think that once he is out of your life you will feel so much better and even empowered. You do have control over your life. Sounds like your boyfriend doenst have control over his.

He could have a bleeding ulcer which is a HUGE problem. He could be throwing up fresh blood or what looks like coffee grounds but is actually blood.

He does indeed need to get to a doctor and if you want a normal life, you need to get away from this guy because you won't have it with him.

Thank everyone for your response. I will keep you updated.