Additionally, my hair is now over shoulder length and I'm having a hard time accepting that I want to grow it longer and resist getting it permed again.

But I KNOW that I have to choice between either letting it grow longer or perm it. I think I'll search a hairdresser that wants to curl my hair with my own bendies, since I'm far from an expert in doing it myself... (and no, there is nobody who can do it for me, unfortunately)
I do love my long hair, no matter what some told me already. The outgrowth perm does even make it look nice. At least, it looks nice for me, that's all that counts.

The best example I have to show how much I love my long hair is either taking a lock of hair and putting it at my nose to smell the shampoo and the hair. And when I get a haircut to remove split ends, I always make it clear that I let my hair grow long for a GOOD REASON in the first place...
It took some time with hairdressers that I rather not visit any longer to understand this simple logic.