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Joined: Sep 2007
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Gecko
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At University there were a couple of girls who slept with all of their dates - I think they thought it was sophisticated and mature...
It didn't work out for them - after many years they were still looking for love and only getting sex. At University they developed a reputation so were very popular, but my male friends told me that men always spoke about them disrespectfully. One actually ended up with an STD and she always seemed to have gynaecological problems, bladder infections and the like. I often wondered what she was doing and why she acted the way she did? Maybe, there was something in her past...

The long hair theory sparked my interest - I had long blonde hair - maybe, that's why I attracted creeps? One of my friends told me she had no problem with lechers, flashers, drunks, weirdos unless she was in my company...Great!
I didn't trust men and so, just concentrated on my studies.
I rarely dated and when I did, I didn't enjoy myself, so what was the point?
I was starting to think it was all too difficult when I met my DH. Some of my friends have asked me, whether I regret not dating lots of men in my 20s. (I have been with my DH since I was 24 so that's 25 years now)
My answer is a resounding, "No, absolutely no regrets"...and that's the truth...

I agree that intimacy is very important - my favourite moments are things like sharing a leisurely breakfast on Sunday morning and curled up on the sofa in front of the fire watching a movie...or enjoying a meal and a bottle of wine together...or planning our next holiday AND, knowing that he is always there for me - that's what I'd really miss....




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haridas Offline OP
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I feel that this discussion is getting interesting. Freebubbles, to begin with, I did not say that women with career ambitions want to increase chances with sex. What I said that they do not have time for relationships and satisfy themselves with a quickie.

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haridas Offline OP
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Hollyelise,

You say that you have an attractive figure. That drwas men towards you. Do women with normal figure also get asked for sex on the first date?

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Koala
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Yes. But certain figures draw more attention.

Many of my students are teachers also... in public schools or at the college, and they talk of their experiences. One of my students has talked several times about a female student of hers (an early teen) who has an hourglass figure, and how much of a problem that is in class and for the girl. The girl is not interested in boys right now, but all the boys in class compete heavily for her and bother her and try to bribe her, and it challenges the teacher to maintain order and the classes attention on coursework. The teacher has said the girl does nothing to encourage this.

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haridas Offline OP
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Hollyelise,

Pl. read my earlier post again.

Do women with normal figure also get asked for sex on the first date?

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Koala
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i already answered that question to the best of my knowledge.

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Koala
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I think men wanting sex any where, any time, any place, is the way mother nature pre-disposed them to be. The sexual burden to procreate is hardwired largely in the male, in most species. But this doesn't mean that the average human male is a slave to this biological drive. Men are more than solely sexual beings, just as women are. I know that many men crave long term companionship with one woman. I also have male friends who are quite capable of maintaining friendships with women without sex ever entering into it. Nature hardwiring men (and to a lesser degree women) to procreate may cause a challenge at times for us to remain in sane control of our libido, but i think most men (over the age of 25 perhaps) would prefer long term companionship to sexual free-for-all.

let me clearify... most men are raise to get sex anywhere any time the whole boys will be boys and the more notches the better. I did not mean that there are not men out there capible of having normal heathy relationships both as friends and as husbands... but most boys are incouraged to sow there oats and marry a "good Girl" (read virgin...) and it is fine for a man to stay single all his life or marry later in life where for women we are taught a little girls to fall in love, stay a virgin until marrage, marry and make babies... we can have the career and whatever but it is still expected that we marry somewhere in our 20s.

and

Freebubbles, to begin with, I did not say that women with career ambitions want to increase chances with sex. What I said that they do not have time for relationships and satisfy themselves with a quickie.

I didnt mean to inply that women with careers wanted many sex partners or more sex. I think you have a point about no time for a relationship... sex is a quick fix for many women who want a relationship. it give them a feeling of connection and a fake relationship with someone. this is where many women get heart broken. they have sex with a person and they start to think that that person and her is in love and everything then the man walks away and she doesnt know why or she finds out that he has another girl on the side. She fantisies this happy monogomas relationship and she doesnt realize that she is the booty call and she is just one in a long string or booty calls....or he falls in love with someone else.


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Koala
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Koala
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Do women with normal figure also get asked for sex on the first date?

I have to take a stabe at this one.

I have always been fat, big boobs and long blond hair and I had men and boy friends try to get sex from me even if we had never met!

My best friend was thin, tall and long blond-ish red hair and she had the same problem except total strangers did not come up and say hey baby wannna FU#@??? they tried to charm her out of her pants where i just had the rude crude and obnoxous men and preverts.

the point is i think all women have this problem but depending on the figure wi depending on the kind of guys and comments you get.

Men tend to think that fat women have a low self esteem so all they have to do is say F@@@ Me and we will fall at there feet and they can treat us anyway they want and we will feel lucky to have them and be gratful for it!!! but women who are motel beautiful get charm and i love you's and gifts and dinner and the best side of the man until he figures out that he is not going to get what he wants then he changes.....


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haridas Offline OP
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Freebubbles, very good posts.

Tell me, are all of us not hypocrites on this forum?
Most of us use the F word in life but dare not write in the forum.

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Koala
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There are other possibilities, haridas, why people don't post. For instance, at present many people are busy with their families and preparing for Christmas.


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