BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Abortion...

Lady T, I think your a good friend for going and being supportive of a friend. While I would not make the same decision, I would go and be supportive of my friend, rather then try and judge her and control her like that.

As people we all have to live our lives according to our own moral code. I don't feel its right to FORCE our beliefs on others. Its one thing if they ask your advice but forcing it on someone who is already no doubt struggling is un-called for.

Lady_T -- you are awesome. Your friend will never forget you, and you'll never forget how you stood in the face of being judged by even your own mother, which is very tough.

Your friend would have done the same thing with or without you, and whether you condone it or not, whether you'd chose the same for yourself or not, you came through for your friend.

My mother would have freaked out, too...and she would have freaked out if at any time I got pregnant and aborted. We can't always live as our parents lived. In making alternative choices from them, we're not doing drugs, we're not sleeping around, and we're not jobless deliquents. Some of us just choose differently, yet part of them will always see us as rebellious teenagers, even when we're in our 30s and 40s.

Lady T,
I agree with Angela...you are a true friend, and your support will be remembered forever.

My POV is that I, as a man, realize that a baby in the womb is a life. Thusly, I could not in good conscience ask someone to have an abortion for my sake.

On the other hand, I know that I can NEVER feel what a woman feels with regards to having a life inside of me. Thusly, even though I know that the fetus is a child and a life, the woman is the one who is going to bear the full brunt of such a life changing event. I can not be a judge as to what a woman does -- whether it be to have the child and keep it, to have the child and give the child up for adoption, or to have it aborted.

The absolute seriousness of the potential result of sexual activity is why I have made damned sure that there is no way possible that my wife will EVER get pregnant, from the first time I met her. I would not want to put someone in such a position. At times, it has meant large sacrifices, but for both my, and her, peace of mind, it ensures that there will never be any doubts.

We're talking about the creation of an new LIFE here. If only OTHERS thought about what sex really, REALLY exists for (it does NOT exist for pleasure, it exists for PROCREATION as its base purpose!) the world would be a much better place, and people would be a lot happier!

I tend to overanalyze things, which at times is a good thing. That is why I feel that the "obvious" needs to be stated.

I realize that this sounds like I am an old fashioned pragmatist, preaching "traditional" values, but facts are facts.

You pays your money, you takes your chances. Be careful -- really careful!

True to form, one of our token males nailed it. Thanks, Duane_Va:
The creation of someone's LIFE -- a whole new human with a life to live on its own, with you to give so much to and sacrifice so much for in 25+ years -- is the thing we're all okay with not doing.

I know that if I ever got pregnant, I would be waiting outside the clinic until it opened!

My friend got pregnant last year and after much agonizing, she decided she was going to get an abortion. Her boyfriend went crazy and said that if she got the abortion, he would kill himself. He was a controlling guy.

We went to the clinic and they had all these protesters out there. My friend is a very staunch catholic and there was a priest out there and he was screaming at us that we both would be damned to hell, one of us because we were killing our baby and the other one because we were helping. I got insanely [censored] off and I started screaming at them, "If you think you guys are going to heaven, then I'd rather be in hell and be away from you idiots!" (My friend was horrified by the way.)

That is the one thing that pisses me off more than anything. I hate how people think they can dicate what women do with their bodies. And it seems to me that the religious people are the ones that are leading the front. Whatever happened to not judging?

(Oh and my friend's EX-boyfriend is still walking around and never made good on his promise.)

The biblical concept, I think, is called "Love the sinner, hate the sin." Mainly that is heard when dealing with the gay/lesbian peoples. However, when they are yelling at you like that, how the hell can you tell the difference?

Yeah it is a little difficult to tell when they are screaming and chanting and whatnot. If I had a little shred of religion in me at that point, it was completely taken away because of that scene. I felt so bad for my friend too because she is the total God fearing type and I can tell it really bothered her. In fact, when we got inside, she said that she didn't want to go to hell and wanted to change her mind. We talked about it and she ended up going through with it but now she is totally convinced she's going to hell when she dies.

Are all those people out there going to give her the money, the support, and the help to take care of the baby if she chose to have it? I think not!

The woman is not the one whose life is going to be terminated. What do you think the unborn child would want? It is the mothers responsibility to care for her child.

I used to live in Worcestor Mass, I went downtown to apply for a job in an office buildling there. I had not been prepared for the fact that there was also a planned parenthood in the building.

Outside was a priest in full garb, complete with the remains of a baby in what looked like lucite. I just have to ask, who is it that doesn't have respect for a baby when someone is carrying around the remains of one. The priest himself told me to NOT kill my baby etc. I told him I was applying for work in a medical billing firm in the same building. He behaved as if he didn't believe me AND all but grabbed me as I was trying to get through the people in the picket line outside.

Frankly I was horrified and I wasn't even pregnant. I can't imagine what running that kind of gauntlet would be like if I were pregnant. I assume thats what they want, to scare people away.