BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Bill Maher- New Rule

New Rules, September 14 2007 <---Full article

Hi all. Bill definitely made my night with this one

"...And finally, New Rule - and I never thought I'd be the one to say this, but: Don't show me your tits. Last week, the world's first "Nurse In" was held to protest the case of a woman who was breast-feeding in public, and asked by an Appleby's manager not to leave, but just to cover up a little bit. Because the wait staff got tired of hearing, "I'll have what that kid's having."

Look, I'm not trying to be insensitive here. I know your baby needs to eat, but so do I, and this is Appleby's, so I'm already nauseous.

Breast-feeding a baby is an intimate act, and I don't want to watch strangers performing intimate acts. At least not for free. It cheapens it. But breast-feeding activists - yes, breast-feeding activists, called "lactivists" - say this is a human right and appropriate everywhere, because it's natural. Well, so is masturbating, but I generally don't do that at Appleby's. Not in the main dining area, anyway.

I mean, next thing, women will be wanting to give birth in the waterfall at the mall! Look, there's no principle at work here other than being too lazy to either plan ahead or cover up. It's not fighting for a right. It's fighting for the spotlight you surely will get when you go all "Janet Jackson" on everyone. And get to drink in the "oohs" and "aahs" from the other customers because "You made a baby!" Something a dog can do.

Only in America do women think they deserve a medal for having a kid. In China, women give birth on their lunch hour, and by the afternoon, they're back on line, painting lead onto Barbie dolls.

But this isn't really about women taking their breasts out in public, as much as I'd like it to be. It's about how petty and parochial our causes have become, how activism has become narcissism. It's why Al Gore can't get people to focus on global warming unless there's a rock concert. "Melting icebergs, brought to you by Smashing Pumpkins."

It's why there'll be no end to this dumb war until there is a draft. Because, at the end of the day, Iraq is somebody else's problem.

And, by the way, there is a place where breasts and food do go together. It's called 'Hooters'"

Oh yea -- my wife alerted me to this New Rules segment of this past week's show. I couldn't help but laugh at the truthfulness of what he said.

Just like what has been said on here, so eloquently...

"Look at me! I made a baby! Aren't you proud of me?"
"Good for you! You've done what rats do every day without thinking!"

Hilarious! That's priceless. I don't know how people suddenly go from being modest about clothing, and then suddenly bare all just b/c they have had a baby. I would never be comfortable acting like that in public.

Thanks for sharing this. I laughed so hard at work I hoped no one come by and wonder why. I don't think they would find it as funny as I do. But I can't wait to share it with my husband tonight. I love it!

Lol, I love the part about masturbating!:)

I think some women are just animals. I was reading a piece in Mary Claire magazine and the cover girl, Jennifer Garner, said how she loved breastfeeding b/c it gave her a sense of purpose.
Maybe she should have been a wet nurse instead of an actress.

Believe it or not, my fiance (a proud daddy who has always accepted my CF stance quietly and supported it more for financial reasons than anything else) is the one who sent this "New Rules" link to me yesterday. His purpose was one of the other items, earlier in the piece, but I stuck out until the end (where the public breast feeding rant was located)... and it was definitely worth it! I was cracking up!

Oh, this broke me up!!

LOL I'm so glad you guys enjoyed this as much as I did. I watched the show and was so glad to have someone speaking publicly about these topics. And it was deliciously funny too. Sorry to say my fiance (also a proud daddy like myrabeth's) didn't find it so... oh well. You guys understand :-)

This is great! I really liked the giving birth in the waterfall part - there's a mental image for you!

There was an interesting case in Australia some years ago where a couple took a baby into a fine dining restaurant - the baby was very noisy and the mother decided to breastfeed at the table. The couple were asked to leave - they sued the restaurant citing discrimination and lost. Basically the Court decided it was inappropriate to take a baby into a very expensive restaurant - that a certain ambiance was expected by the diners and they were entitled to enjoy the experience. It was also noted that many of the diners were parents who had arranged sitters for the night.
Some couples struggle to accept that their lives have changed after the arrival of a child and that the things they enjoyed in the past may not be possible for a few years.
By the way - the restaurant was "Lynchs" - a "baby free zone" sign now appears near the front door - the owner is not anti- children - he is a father and grandfather. I think his view was that he was operating a "special occasion" restaurant and that experience would be diminished with a screaming baby at the next table!