BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids FYI, from truemomconfessions.com

It shows how life-threatening pregnancy can be, when so many people think it's no big deal.

Unfortunately, this scenario is one of those things that "never" happens -- much like "my kids will be smart and always well behaved", "I will love them and enjoy taking care of them 24/7", "They will NEVER get on my nerves, I love them so much", "My child can't be born with autism or a birth defect".

Having kids is like playing Russian roulette. What is the guarantee that you'll be killed or hurt? Not much -- but it is still there. Are you kids going to be ok when born? Spin the revolver and see. Having kids is the ultimate in gambling -- only you are gambling with other innocent lives, or forcing an uninterested party (be it the man OR woman) to be an unwilling accomplice by gambling with the rest of their lives. If you win, you win big time. If you lose, well, there is alwaysBellaOnline ALERT: Raw URLs are not allowed in these forums for security reasons. Please use UBB code. If you don't know how to do UBB code just post here for help - we will help out!

I think it is a little late to change your mind now.

08.02.07 8:45p
I didn't lose myself or my mind when i had children. I became a better me. Nothing in the world can compare to being a mom.


Nothing in the world like a little humility, eh?

Notice that she doesn't say what she actually did before becoming a Mom? I mean, there is no comparative analysis of what she came from to where she is now.

It's comments like this that really get to me. There is no way in the universe that this mother could have possibly tried out all the jobs in the world, found out what each and every individual's likes and dislikes are on the planet and then come to the conclusion that nothing else compares. Full stop. No arguments, this is the best there is. I wonder if she only has one really young child that hasn't even started solid foods yet.

I agree, Malamutes. Whenever I hear comments like that, I always think the person must not have been very evolved, interesting, or accomplished to begin with. It's as if she's saying, "Nothing interesting or meaningful ever happened in my life - and then I had a kid. Now I have a purpose. Without a child I wouldn't know what to do with myself." Well, yes, compared to the boring person she was before motherhood, life has become more complex. Perhaps I'm reading too much into these statements, but people who say this sort of thing just seem very limited to me.

That is because in too many people's minds, there is go greater triumph than being a parent. Every other role that a person could possibly occupy pales in comparison.

"When my daughter wakes up early in the morning after only 6 hours of sleep and wants to play i find myself wishing that i had never had her. The short sleepy walk from my bed to her crib is spent silently cursing her for waking me up. Sometimes when i pick her up i swat her on the behind. Never hard enough to hurt, she never notices. She annoys the hell out of me a hundred times a day. Once after she was born, i had a dream that i had smothered her with a pillow and faked it as SIDS, i woke up and didn't mind the dream too much.
Yet last night i had a dream that she had fallen off a balcony and she was black and blue and bruised and bleeding all over and i woke up crying. I couldn't imagine losing her, living without her. Yes she is a pain, she doesn't let me sleep, eat, shower or spend time with my husband, but i do love her so very much."

Scary! Thankfully the "Me Too's" were 0, but it is still early.

It kind of reminds me of how GW Bush credits becoming a Christian with saving him from his alcoholism.

That's great for you and your family, W., if that's what did the trick. But a lot of us out there do just fine without drink *or* religion...your problems aren't everybody's problems, nor are your solutions.

An excellent point Bonsai- we are all unique and just because something works for one person doesn't mean that is the "cure all" for the rest of us or that we even need to be "cured" from anything at all.

On a side note- I had a horrible nightmare the other night about giving birth to a baby. I know it might sound weird, but it scared the [censored] out of me. I woke up sweating, disoriented and completely freaked out. That just confirms for me that if I were to go down this road I would end up with a never ending list of regrets and life is just too fun right now for that!

Oh, god, I've had those dreams too. They are AWFUL!!!