BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Not sure how I feel about this (work related)

This afternoon I received notification of a new, critical meeting that was scheduled for 5PM-6PM.

I had plans for this evening (attending happy hour with a large number of former colleagues). Needless to say, I went to the meeting instead. "I have a social activity" would not have cut it for getting out of it.

However, "I have to pick up the kids" probably would have. In that situation, though, I'd look less dedicated ("mommy track!")and would not have been able to provide my input (and the meeting was about something that falls under my management, so my input was pretty important).

So on the one hand, I'm annoyed that my after-hours plans (which I did mention) weren't considered an impediment to my attendance, because after all, I don't have kids, so I have no reason to, you know, go home. (In all fairness though; only one of the other four people in the meeting has kids; the rest are CF or pre-parents, so one would think they'd understand the unfairness in that way of thinking!)

On the other hand, I was kind of pleased to have had the opportunity to show how very dedicated and career-oriented I am, by being able to work unscheduled overtime like that- where a parent just plain wouldn't be able to. Sort of a declaration of, "See, I'm not on the mommy track, you can promote me and count on me to be there."

Fortunately this kind of last-minute after hours meeting is very uncommon so I don't think it'll happen again, at least for some time.

What do you guys think?

I had a similar situation happen yesterday. Boss realized he got the date wrong on a report that was due and had to get it done right away. I wound up staying at work until 7. I like my job and knew it had to get done, so I did not have any real problem. I admit though, as it got later, I remembered that baseball game I planned to listen to and was annoyed that it was likely more than halfway over!!

I think my feelings on these situations depend on the employer and the expectations for extra hours and flexibility allowed. At this position, it is perfectly acceptable for me to say, "my cat is sick, I need to take her to the vet" and leave for two hours smack in the middle of the day. In exchange, I will stay late unexpectedly.

At my last job, I worked with a woman who had 4 kids and was pregnant with number 5. She really took advantage and I had to pick up all the slack. The job was a nightmare and I knew I would not be getting any points for going above and beyond. At that job, SHE was more likely to get promoted because she could relate to the boss who had kids and man trouble....

I don't think any worker should have to explain why they can't make a last minute, after hours meeting. It's the worker's choice whether or not to change plans and go to the meeting, and getting ahead at work is certainly a factor that should be considered. If one decides not to stay, for whatever reason, I think a simple, "I can't stay tonight," should suffice. Many (especially the CF) tend to overexplain, maybe because we don't have the kids to use as an excuse. Just because we don't have kids doesn't mean we don't have anything important to do!

Emeraldwednesday, you said this doesn't happen very often at your workplace, and it sounds like attending the meeting was a good move for your career. If it starts happening more often, then I think I'd take a stand and not attend if I had plans.

I totally agree with iluvsummer: