BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids BC vs. VASECTOMY

Hi all!
I am a new member of this forum. It's so nice to have a place to share our lives and points of view about our very unique choice. I believe we certainly are very special people just by the very fact that we have made the choice of not 'going with the flow'. I mean that in the very best way.

Anyway, I was hoping some of you could shed light on this subject. I was reading previous posts and read one that just sent chills down my spine. It said something about a vasectomy getting 'healed', and it meant that somehow, after a while, the vasectomy 'doesn't work' because the ends were not tied properly or burned? I am trying to convince my DH to get a vasectomy because I am kind of tired of taking the pill, and a little bit concerned about possible side effects down the line, since I have been on it for 15 years (it's always worked fine for me, thank you very much). As I approach 40 (next year) I thought that a) it is time for him to do as much as I have in regards to our decision to be CF, and b) I will enter menopause before you know it and, again, I don't know if it is such a good idea to be on the pill then. I absolutely, and most certainly, do not want to risk getting pregnant in those pre-menopausal years, when our periods are going beserk. To me, a vasectomy was the answer to all these concerns but, after I read that post, I got scared. Like I said, I don't want to risk getting pregnant ever, especially not after 40! I will take up celibacy before I take that risk! (not that my DH would agree to that option...hahaha).

I will, of course, research this further on the appropriate sites, but thought that someone might be able to enlighten me on the subject, in a more 'user-friendly' mannner.

Thanks!!

Have you considered getting a tubal ligation ? This is where the doctor cuts your falliopian tubes and then ties them back together. I had mine done thirty years ago anf had no problem. They made an incision through my belly button and you can't even see it. I can wear a two piece bathing suit and you could never tell.
If you do this you can controll the descision. Men get squimish about their little friend. LOL

My dh had one 13 years ago, and our youngest is 13. Yes it worked, and it worked well. And it is much easier for the male, no surgery. And less expensive. Just make sure the follow up check up takes place, it's the tell all. Good luck on your decision!

Also read about the risks:

www.dontfixit.org

Tiali, I am 50 and still on the pill, and if anything, I have less problems with regard to menopause than mre problems.
Invasive surgery for women takes longer to recover from, than this intervention for men. Tubal litigation can also bring on the MP earlier, or so my female doctor tells me....
My partner is scheduled to also have a vasectomy, but inspite of the "risks" of re-joining, or worse, constant testicular pain which occurs in some men but is thankfully rare, the risks are greater to a woman due to general anaesthesia as opposed to the local.
I have decided to use a dutch cap and to stop with the pill, simply because I wish to go through my menopause as "naturally" as possible.

I'm not telling you which way to go, that's up to you. But well done you for exploring every avenue, and I just thought I'd add my perspective and POV.

I think it's pretty rare for a vasectomy to "heal" on its own. There's got to be some statistics on this out there somewhere...

My husband had a vasectomy. No problems. Have him talk to the doctor who should know all the proper statistics without the scare tactics. Vasectomy has much less risk than a tubal. It is a tiny incision. With a tubal, they have to breech the abdominal wall, no matter the size of the incision. You then have greater risk of infection, adhesions, hernia.

The vast majority of men who have it have no problems. The only way it could "heal" is if they didn't take a large enough section out...and didn't seal the ends properly...and your husband had some freakish ability to spontaneously regenerate spermatic cord tissue. Rare circumstances. Find a good doctor in a reputable clinic and talk to them. Good luck.

My husband got a vasectomy last November. He's claims to feel no different than before. I'd been on the pill for 20 years and although I had no problems with it, I felt it was time for me to stop.

The vasectomy most likely to reconnect (although it's still rare) is the no-scalpel where they only cut and don't tie the tubes. My husband's was the scalpel kind and the doctor both cauterized and tied the ends -- no worries here!

As you probably know, vasectomy is far cheaper than a tubal by at least a thousand dollars and is a much less invasive surgery. Plus I suspect there's less scrutiny towards a childless man getting sterilized than there is towards a childless woman.

Hi Tiaali,
Read the links below. Feel free to PM me or e-mail me if you have questions. I have zero regrets about getting snipped in September, 2006. I have been single for 2 months after splitting up with my girlfriend of nearly 2 years. I am sure my next girlfriend will be as happy as my previous girlfriend was to be relieved of the burden of birth control.
Mike

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Thanks all! I will do more research on all possibilities, but I think I'm inclined more towards the vasectomy option. Thanks for the links Mike_e! I will show my DH your post about the vasectomy not interfering AT ALL with sexual performance, enjoyment, libido, etc.. I think he will come around once I show him the facts. He always does.

Thanks again!!